Tonight’s episode of The Bachelorette was a mostly by the numbers affair, with a solo date, a group date, some forced emoting and a couple dudes fired into the sun from a catapult by Kween Sophie, as per usual.
Leave it to stage-five clinger and possible sociopath Jarrod to supply the only real moment of note and unfortunately it’s a recycled story line from last week: his fucken’ plant that got pissed in.
In case you missed it (oh to be so innocent and free), in last Thursday’s episode future restraining order recipient Jarrod sewed his seed (ew, not like that) and potted a plant for Sophie, in some weird gesture of gardening-based romance.
When it failed to began to sprout, combined with the fact it one hundred percent smelt like piss, Jarrod came to the conclusion that someone had in fact, weed in it.
— #BacheloretteAU (@BacheloretteAU) October 5, 2017
Unlike most sane people who would then be like “eh that’s a shitty move, but it is just a fuckin’ plant, best move on with my life and not make a big deal about”, he made a HUGE BLOODY DEAL ABOUT IT, accusing any penis-owner near him, of slighting not only him, but his family and his ancestors.
We all thought it was over last week, but nope, Jarrod used tonight’s “question in a bowl” game at the group sleepover party to bring it all up again, in an effort to see just how far the vein above his right eye could extricate itself from his forehead.
Jarrod: Grow up boys, Sophie wants an adult like me
Blake: I pissed on a plant lol
Also Jarrod: pic.twitter.com/TBTQ53Qdyy
— telly enthusiasts 🌈 (@trash_telly) October 11, 2017
— kali hall (@kalih) October 11, 2017
— Nads (@Andtheysaidwhat) October 11, 2017
Let’s be real at this point. The people DO NOT like Jarrod. He seems controlling, quick-to-anger, rude and worst of all only seems to be able to perceive Sophie through the guise of what he, a manly man, decides.
The fact he continues to piss about (lol) on this most trivial matter to make him seem like an alpha is simply an embarassment on top of all the other embarrassments that constitute the life of Jarrod.
Australia agrees Soph, it’s time for Jarrod to GTFO.
The fact Sophie chooses creepy ass Jarrod over several other decent men astounds me #BacheloretteAU
— jessica (@hcrrington) October 11, 2017
Jarrod: obsesses over Sophie after first date for weeks – safe
Mack: obsesses over Sophie for 25 seconds – eliminated
— Rachel Tennison (@racheltenno) October 11, 2017
Jarrod: “What Sophie wants is…”
Women don’t want men telling them what they want, you boring, chauvinist tool. #BacheloretteAU
— CMcK (@CVMcK) October 11, 2017
OMFG Jarrod is shitting me to tears! STFU already u massive wanker! #BacheloretteAU 🤦♀️🙄🙄🙄🙄
— Lozza (@LaurenSchickert) October 11, 2017
Sophie, ditch him girl.