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Even if you’ve been on a million dates in your life (you go Glen Coco), meeting someone for the first time never gets any easier. You’ll still be a nervous wreck in the moments leading up to it, and continuously catastrophise every moment that, in your mind at least, doesn’t go as planned.
For many potential relationships, the first date is the one chance you have to prove yourself before you’re written off as a “I had fun, but I’m just not feeling it”. Harsh, but unfortunately true. We live in a world somewhat dictated by social media and online relationships, and peeps on the dating circuit know the next best thing is only a right swipe away. Rebounding’s also never been easier.
So how can you prevent that kind of rejection from going down? Make a good first impression, of course. We asked around the PEDESTRIAN.TV office to find out some of their memorable first impressions on a date. Some of these people are even still together, so the proof is in the pudding and all of that.
There’s nothing unsexier than someone who’d rather look at the floor than into your eyes. Sure, it might make your date feel like they’ve got a hold on you because you’re clearly too nervous to create eye contact, but that’s not going to get you anywhere long-term. It’s just downright uncomfortable for all involved. Look at ’em in the eyes. Control any wandering-eye tendencies you might have as well, for the love of god.
PUT IN SOME EFFORT
P.TV’s Associate News Editor, Alex Bruce-Smith, reckons it’s the effort that counts.
“Did he iron his shirt??? If a dude looks like they made some kind of effort, that will go a long way into making me think he cares. If he looks like he rolled in off the couch… see you later,” she said.
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A PRE-DATE TEXT
It’s absolute balls organising a date a couple of days in advance. Do you follow up to make sure it’s still happening? Short answer: YES. It’s polite – not creepy / weird. Whether you get there a little early and text to ask what drink they’d like you to order, or send a courtesy message to say you’re on your way, it’s all nice and completely welcomed. No prior text can make it all feel very clinical and business meeting-like. And that’s not sexy.
BE POLITE TO STAFF
“Being polite to staff at wherever the date is has always been a major ‘good sign’ for me,” Pedestrian’s own Melissa Mason said, and she makes a point.
“I find people who say thank you when they’re given their beers, or acknowledge a waiter when they refill your water glass are generally not going to be secret dickheads. On the other hand, people who are rude to bartenders are likely to be selfish creeps, in my book.”
You’re going to be a huge ball of nerves and probably talk yourself up to kill the silence, but try and ask questions as often as possible. Pretty sure only people with massive insecurities would hang around for someone full of themselves.
DON’T TAKE OWNERSHIP
Ah, the age-old question of who should foot the bill. There’s a fine line between being generous and coming across as a control freakazoid.
“A HUGE HUGE turnoff is making a huge show about paying for everything and insisting on it. That makes me feel like he’s trying to hard to control the situation / me. Just accept we’re going to go round for round,” Alex explained.