It is difficult to comprehend the strangeness of Kylie Jenner‘s reality. It is one thing to be born into wealthy family, but another entirely to be raised as part of a business enterprise. Many people have parlayed their proximity to celebrity into successful careers, but few have gone on to lead US $900M empires. Fewer still can call Kanye West their brother-in-law.
What we’re getting at is that Jenner has had a wild, privileged, enchanted, and deeply bizarre upbringing, the quirks of which we generally only see through the wilder moments of Keeping Up With The Kardashians. Today, though, in a rare unguarded moment, Jenner revealed a startling truth: she successfully made it to the age of 21 without ever eating breakfast cereal with milk.
Taking to Twitter, the make-up entrepreneur revealed that big dietary omission:
last night i had cereal with milk for the first time. life changing.
— Kylie Jenner (@KylieJenner) September 19, 2018
The full weight of that statement was not lost on Seth Rogen, a celebrity whose existence likely include breakfast cereals consumed the recommended way:
Wait till you try peanut butter and jam.
— Seth Rogen (@Sethrogen) September 19, 2018
Jenner then explained her predilection for the dry-ass morsels, saying she just… Never got around to dousing her breakfast with cow juice.
i always liked cereal dry i never bothered to put milk
— Kylie Jenner (@KylieJenner) September 19, 2018
She revealed the cereal in question, likely boosting the market cap for General Mills in the process.
Cinnamon Toast Crunch. amazing https://t.co/9szGNV67ht
— Kylie Jenner (@KylieJenner) September 19, 2018
She then solicited advice on what other liquids she could douse all over her foodstuffs.
Regular. Should i try almond next time? https://t.co/ewfPhkJ1CA
— Kylie Jenner (@KylieJenner) September 19, 2018
Cereal first https://t.co/q7QaSoj1mj
— Kylie Jenner (@KylieJenner) September 19, 2018
Now, it is incumbent on us to decide what we do with this information.
Do we simply cast this aside as an anomaly easily replicated in the lives of ordinary humans, or as a sign of a deeper and more significant disconnect with the proletariat? Can we truly accept Jenner as one of the Western world’s most well-known figures when she openly flouted breakfast conventions for decades?
And will this episode be cannibalised by the all-encompassing machine that is the Kardashian family, and sold back to us as a twee makeup palette named after other famous cereals?
