You probably hear this a lot, but I mean it when I say there has never been a better time to search the gutters and rubbish bins of Brunswick. It’s impossible to know why, but some lunatic with a lottery ticket managed to nab a heart-palpitation-inducing $55 million Powerball win on Thursday last week and has, thus far, completely failed to claim that win.
Did they lose the ticket? Did they suddenly decide to take up a monastic Luddite existence and have been completely insulated from any form of media that would have let them know they won? Did they decide that the overall impact of receiving a hideously large sum of cash at once would upset the delicate balance of their life so deleteriously that they were actually better off not having won it? Did they trip over and fall into a well on their way to claim their win? We simply do not know.
What we do know is that the ticket was not registered, $55 million is a dacks-crappingly large sum of cash, and the ticket was purchased at Scole Lotto & News and, if you haven’t got much on, you should probably head over to the area and search every crevice that could feasibly hold a discarded slip of paper.
