Now I may not be a Rugby League expert, but I do know a thing or two about the Dally M Medal presentation ceremony and that is it’s the NRL WAGs’ night of nights. Let’s take a look at what they wore on the red carpet, but first I am obliged to tell you that firm favourite Ben Barba from the Canterbury-Bankstown Bulldogs was the player that actually won the Medal. And now to the WAGs…
Celebrity Apprentice graduate Lauryn Eagle attended with Todd Carney. She wore glitter-coated shoes, a feathered skirt and ludicrous diamond-weave casing over a black lace bra. Accessorised with a ‘I know you’re looking at my boobs right now’ smirk. Todd Carney was clearly stoked (see header image above).
Here’s Ben Barba who won the medal with his girlfriend Ainslie Curry in a perfectly acceptable mauvey-white peplum number and side swept hair do. Good work Ben. Not so good work on the suit with shiny satin parts and pants requiring further tailoring.
Good grief. Zoe Balbi has an amazing body which looks excellent in this bauble-encrusted gold number, however she seems to be wearing it back to front, because nipples should not have to be wrangled sidewards in order to remain out of view. Despite 75% of her breasts on show, it’s still a glamorous effort with a gorgeous sleek blow wave.
Dave Taylor’s wife Ashlee Taylor wears a drapey ice blue gown and fresh-faced make up. She looks very pretty except for those alarming pointy glittery shoes. Ladies, what’s going on with the glitter-covered shoes? Good on Dave for the matching ice blue tie.
Paul Gallen and fiancee Anne are a handsome couple. Anne is a beautiful girl, beautiful enough to make this hideously sequined blue gown look acceptable. The white satin clutch is also a crime.
Simone Ennis‘s cup runneth over in a liquid silk gown. Husband Michael Ennis impresses me with a chin square enough to make Roger Ramjet feel inadequate.
Sally Carne is the diamond-covered partner of Michael Crocker. She has the concentrated face and awkward pose of a woman desperately willing her velvet bodice to maintain nipple coverage.
Akuila Uate’s date Samantha Maton takes inspiration from ice dancing costumes and Ethereal Princess Barbie Doll to get this embellished blue number. [Note: ice dancing costumes and Ethereal Princess Barbie are categorically horrendous]
Tessa James, girlfriend of Nate Myles, should smile more because she wins the award for best red carpet ensemble with a breasty-but-not-too-breasty little black dress, great shoes and the popping yellow clutch.
The only thing I hate worse than beige patent pumps is a dress the colour of perspiration stain. Robbie Farrah’s date Krisinda Merhi makes up for these abominations with a winning warm smile.
Sarah Callaway is foiled by her frock’s matronly shape and the mega-bun hair style. Snaps for the cute date though.
Jack De Belin’s date is Alyce Taylor whose style appears to have been inspired by Jessica Simpson in that retired-cheerleader-meets-meh kind of way.
WHY DIDN’T ANYONE TELL ME DANA SCULLY IS IN TOWN.
Photos by Mark Kolbe for Getty Images