US World Cup Captain Megan Rapinoe Is A Whole Damn Ass Mood I Tell You What

If you’re not already acutely aware of the sheer majesty that is US Women’s National Team captain Megan Rapinoe, consider this the crash course to your new crush.

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Leading from the front, and often by her own boot, Rapinoe lead the USWNT on their successful march through the FIFA World Cup, en route to claiming America’s fourth overall women’s World Cup title. Rapinoe rattled in 6 goals during the tournament – the equal-highest tally throughout proceedings – and was named tournament MVP after the final.

She also managed to stir up something of a social movement by telling US President Donald Trump to go fuck himself. Repeatedly. And it’s absolutely kicked ass.

Rapinoe first drew the ire of the President Cheetoh Dust by delivering this instantly iconic dismissal of a potential White House visit for the side.

And true to form, instead of going to the White House, Rapinoe and the USWNT have been going boonta all over New York City, not only by having a whale of a time, but by using the win to issue a frankly stunning call-to-arms.

In a celebratory lap of honour in Manhattan, Rapinoe firstly created the iconic sporting image of the year by grasping the World Cup in one hand, a bottle of fancy champagne in the other, and repeatedly shouting “I DESERVE THIS.”

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The sheer energy radiating off of that is honestly enough to kill off fossil fuels entirely.

Beyond that, Rapinoe turned the torch on full blast once the parade reached City Hall, delivering a stirring speech in front of a sea of adoring fans.

That closing stanza is a pearler, portions of which will surely one day be etched on plaque adorning a statue.

This is my charge to everyone: We have to be better. We have to love more, hate less. We gotta listen more, and talk less. We gotta know that this everybody’s responsibility, every single person here, every single person who’s not here, every single person who doesn’t want to be here, every single person who agrees and doesn’t agree. It’s our responsibility to make this world a better place. I think this team does an incredible job of taking that on our shoulders and understanding the position that we have and the platform that we have in this world. Yes, we play sports. Yes, we play soccer. Yes, we’re female athletes. But we’re so much more than that. You’re so much more than that.

You’re more than a fan. You’re more than someone who just supports sports. You’re more than someone who tunes in every four years. You’re someone who walks these streets every single day. You interact with your community every single day. How do you make your community better? How do you make the people around you better? Your family? Your closest friends? The ten closest people to you? The twenty closest people to you? The hundred closest people to you? It’s every single person’s responsibility.

There’s been so much contention in these last years. I’ve been a victim of that, I’ve been a perpetrator of that. We had a fight with the [United States Soccer] Federation. Sorry for some of the things I’ve said. Not all of the things. But it’s time to come together. This conversation is at the next step. We have to collaborate; it takes everybody.

This is my charge to everybody: Do what you can. Do what you have to do. Step outside yourself. Be more. Be better. Be bigger than you’ve ever been before. If this team is any representation of what you can be when you do that, please take this as an example, this group is incredible. We took so much on our shoulders to be here today, to celebrate with you today, and we did it with a smile. So do the same for us, please, I ask you.

And if you think for a second that the USWNT’s kickass attitude was limited solely to Rapinoe, here’s midfielder Allie Long literally eating a page of the USWNT’s gender discrimination/equal pay lawsuit they filed against the US Soccer Federation, copies of which the team printed out and used as confetti during their victory parade today.

Imagine getting rage-shittingly furious about any part of this.

Un-fucken-real.

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