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Florida, aka America’s COVID-filled armpit, has offered to host the Olympics if Tokyo pulls out and uhh… Thanks, but no thanks.

You truly cannot make this shit up.

The state’s chief financial officer Jimmy Patronis told the International Olympic Committee on Monday that the state would be keen to host the games if Tokyo pulls out.

Patronis wrote to the IOC “to encourage you to consider relocating the 2021 Olympics from Tokyo, Japan to the United States of America, and more specifically to Florida.”

“With media reports of leaders in Japan ‘privately’ concluding that they are too concerned about the pandemic for the 2021 Olympics to take place, there is still time to deploy a site selection team to Florida,” he said.

For context, the entire country of Japan (with a population of 126 million) is recording an average of less than 5,000 cases per day. It’s not great, and they probably shouldn’t hold an international sporting tournament right now, but comparatively, they’re running circles around Florida (population: 21 million), which has a rolling 7-day average of 11,270 cases.

In a very real and *very* Florida move, the state has put their hand up to host the games over a country that is doing significantly better in dealing with the pandemic than they are. Go figure.

The news comes after the Tokyo games committee insisted on Friday that they would be going ahead with this year’s event, which is scheduled from July 23 to August 8 of 2021.

“I am determined to realize a safe and secure Tokyo Games as proof that mankind will have overcome the virus,” Japanese Prime Minister Yoshihide Suga said.

So, uhh… stay tuned for a Florida Man Infects Entire Olympic Village With COVID headline later this year, I guess.