Legit cray nut-job available for hire at your next wedding, work function or the 31st birthday of whichever much-loved dictator holds you at gunpoint in a place closest to your heart, Dennis Rodman has today apologised for damning comments made regarding an American citizen currently detained by North Korea in an interview with CNN yesterday, blaming his incendiary remarks and behaviour on the Goose, which had him feeling loose, and on Patron, which put in the zone.
“It had been a very stressful day. Some of my team-mates were leaving because of pressure from their families and business associates,” writes Rodman in a statement. “My dreams of basketball diplomacy was quickly falling apart. I had been drinking. It’s not an excuse but by the time the interview happened I was upset. I was overwhelmed. It’s not an excuse, it’s just the truth.”
“I want to first apologise to Kenneth Bae’s family,” Rodman continued. “I want to apologise to my teammates and my management team. I also want to apologise to [CNN’s] Chris Cuomo. I embarrassed a lot of people. I’m very sorry. At this point I should know better than to make political statements. I’m truly sorry.”
After getting filthy when that liquor got into him, Rodman – who is in North Korea for the fourth time to partake in a basketball match in occasion of the birthday of Kim Jong-un – then lead a willingly-assembled audience of 14,000 in a rousing rendition of popular ditty ‘Happy Birthday’ not dissimilar from the indelible performance of one Ms Marilyn Monroe for John F. Kennedy; all breathy and electric with barely-contained sexual chemistry. Marilyn’s performance was good too.
Though it’s hard to see for all the blinding light radiating from a thousand beaming smiles, each one brighter than the sun, you can get a vague idea of the “historic” proceedings below.
via The BBC