We’ve teamed up with 20th Century Fox for the home ent release of Mike & Dave Need Wedding Dates on Blu-ray, DVD & Digital HD (which you can snap up HERE). From wingmen / women to drinking buddies and confidantes, the film is full of inspo on what to look for in an A+ partner in crime.
I have been single a very long time and let me tell you, it can be rough.
In my time I’ve had to put myself out there and, you know, try and meet other humans who might be able to put up with me.
The best way I’ve been able to give that a red-hot crack? Drag along a mate who’s sole responsibility in this life is tolerating my mental stank. Some call them wingmen or wingwomen, but the ‘anti cock-block’ or ‘anti clam-jam’ is just as fitting in those early stages.
Some partners in crime are great. Others are fucking terrible. Because I’ve experienced both sides of the rainbow, see below how y’can boost the success rate of your single friend who needs some lovin’.
CALL SHOTGUN
If you’re friends then chances are you have a bunch in common, such as your taste in sweet honeys. Don’t let the wing roles get all confused or as blurry as a Robin Thicke banger – if you’re both single you need to make your preferences clear so that you can both move forward and not impede both your chances in the process. Once you’ve sorted that out, you have room to be the best wingman/woman you can possibly be and FOR THE LOVE OF GOD do not break any bro/girl codes.
DON’T STEAL THEIR THUNDER / LET THEM TAKE THE LEAD
There’s a fine line between helping someone out and making them feel invisible. It’s all well and good to talk about that trip you went on in Mykonos, but let them tell the story about when you got up on the bar and shook ya’ bits. Best approach? Bring a memory up and let them divulge on the antics of the pastime. They are the lead and you’re the support act, OK?
If you don’t take my advice, you risk bringing up their ex or embarrassing stories by accident. Who knew that they wanted to keep the time they did a nudie run in Santorini on the DL? Your interpretations of funny stories could be conflicting in the case of getting P or V.
LET ‘EM PAIR OFF
Once the seeds have been planted and you’ve been able to squeeze their impression of the honey into a quick trip to the bar, you should vibe on how everything is going. Give the pair opportunities to pair off wherever possible. DO NOT join them if they say they’re going for a ciggy, grabbing a drink or have just generally gotten deep in a convo. They’re just fine without your input at this point.
STICK IT OUT
Babes at 3 o’clock? Too bad. Missing your bae at home? Too bad. If you leave before your partner in crime has even come close to sealing the deal, you’re a bad friend. If you bring up that you’ve got a boyfriend / girlfriend too soon, you could also ruin chances had if there’s another person there who’s got the hots for you. All or nothing and all that.
DON’T GET TOO BUCKWILD
Do you really want to make your mate choose between getting you home safely or successfully picking up? Don’t be that guy. No one likes the person who gets in the way of true love ie. you.
Be on the constant lookout for whether or not their lipstick is smudged or their fly is undone. If they find this out before you, hooo boy you’re going straight to the sin bin.
Also, your mate could’ve had a few bevvies and not be seeing / thinking clearly – there’s a chance the person they’re tuning is a dud. A prefers-to-remain anonymous person at P.TV says his mate was a shit wingman because he let him hook up with a low-hanging fruit for his own benefit. Translate: B1 had a hottie so didn’t tell B2 that he had a not-so-hottie, because it would impact B1’s chance of locking down said hottie. Make sense? Good. Because without names I’m finding it terribly difficult to explain this superficial AF situation.
KNOW WHEN YOUR TIME IS UP
A good wingman/woman knows when it’s time to disappear. If it’s getting into the wee hours of the night that’s probably your cue. If they’re hooking up across the dance floor, then yep, you’ve overstayed your welcome. You’ve done good but now it’s time to houdini.
As y’can see, finding the perfect partner in crime is important – for getting yourself on a potential bae’s radar, for getting up to redic antics and for, you know, having one of those good friends things – which is why y’all should get amongst the DVD release of Mike & Dave Need Wedding Dates HERE.
Photo: Mike & Dave Need Wedding Dates.
