This is David Cameron, current Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, husband of Samantha Cameron, noted fan of The Smiths, and amusingly the man who once left his eight-year-old daughter in a pub. By accident.
Look into those eyes:
Closer…
Closer…
This man, the PM of the U.K., is also the man who may or may not have once “put a private part of his anatomy” into a dead pig’s mouth.
This revelation of David Cameron’s alleged incident at his ‘debaucherous’ Oxford University days comes from the jovially-titled biography ‘Call Me Dave‘, co-written by Tory peer Lord Ashcroft, a contemporary of Cameron’s from Oxford, and journalist Isabel Oakeshott.
It’s based on hundreds of interviews from friends and enemies alike; whether it was friend or foe who supplied the dick-in-a-pig story, we know not.
Lord Ashcroft admits that “perhaps it is a case of mistaken identity. Yet it is an elaborate story for an otherwise credible figure to invent.”
And while it doesn’t explicitly state that the “private part of his anatomy” is David’s little Cameron, it’s the logical conclusion; tea-bagging a pig would require an unnecessary amount of balance.
The internet has already lost its absolute mind over #PigGate.
C’mon… How could you not? #piggate pic.twitter.com/EArZytwm2u
— Nish Panchal (@Nish_Panchal) September 20, 2015
Clearly politicians and pigs don’t mix #PigGate pic.twitter.com/7w2z1gZm6o
— Richard Frediani (@FredianiITV) September 20, 2015
And this little pig… Oh dear… nevermind #piggate pic.twitter.com/7cNnl7t79m
— Jeremey Corbyn (@jeremeycorbyn) September 20, 2015
When she doesn’t look the same as her Tinder photos but you’re still horny… #piggate pic.twitter.com/2kcgMIZS8a
— Dave Kelly (@DaveFGKelly) September 20, 2015
“I’ll huff, and I’ll puff and I’ll… ooooh. Yep, that’s done it. Thanks.” #piggate pic.twitter.com/8GNjlz39mh
— Lisa (@biscuitahoy) September 20, 2015
In what might be an explanation for these events, the biography also claims Cameron was part of a ‘dope smoking group’ called the Flam Club.
The more you know.
David Cameron is yet to respond to these allegations, but by god, it’s gonna be good.
Pictures: Peter Macdiarmid / WPA Pool via Getty Images.
via Express.
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