Some unassuming hero, some champion of the night, some modern-day legend has reportedly swooped in in the dead of the moonlight hours, and bashed the living piss out of Donald Trump‘s star of the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
Since ascending to the throne of President of the United States in an election where he attracted 2.9 million less votes than his immediate opponent, Trump’s star on the Walk of Fame has attracted almost routine vandalism from various punters expressing their feelings in various ways.
Folks have scuffed it up, poured beer on it, spat on it, drawn swastikas on it, defaced it, and openly pissed on the square of pavement to the point where it was being described as a health hazard.
Overnight, however, one absolute gun took it that one step further.
Witnesses on the scene called police at around 3:30am local time, reporting that a man had arrived at the site of the star, calmly removed a pickaxe from a guitar case, and had proceeded to smack the drizzling shit out of it like it was his job.
After he finished, he reportedly threw the pickaxe onto the ground, calmly grabbed his phone, and called the cops on himself.
This is Donald Trump’s Walk of Fame star this morning… pic.twitter.com/3hvfivhIOj
— Saint Stinky (@SaintStinky) July 25, 2018
Lieutenant Karen Leong of the LAPD’s Hollywood division stated that a man, Austin Clay, later handed himself into police after calling them to more or less let them know he was coming in.
[Clay] called police and advised he had vandalised Donald Trump’s star and basically called on himself and said, “See you soon.”
In a wild turn of events, Clay was being bailed out of jail by James Otis, a 52-year-old man who, in 2016, bashed the holy hell out of the star with a sledgehammer. In that incident, Otis copped a USD$4,400 fine and 20 days of community service.
Stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame are largely rorts; symbolic slices of pavement that adorn the footpath outside run-down Quiznos, souvenir stores and construction sites that are only available to stars who front up the cash to pay for them; essentially, an elaborate marketing stunt that raises cash for the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce.
So with all that said, beating the god-given snot out Donald Trump’s star with a pickaxe absolutely owns. It owns doubly