There it is, folks. After a full week of his office swearing black and blue that the curiously absent Scott Morrison was not in Hawaii, Scott Morrison has finally admitted that he is, in fact, in Hawaii.

Following on from this morning’s formal press release acknowledging his own absence, the Prime Minister phoned in to John Stanley on 2GB and formally admitted his whereabouts, bringing an end to one of the most brutally bizarre and wholesale damaging weeks a Prime Minister has endured in recent memory.

In a clear damage control move, Morrison admitted his absence was ill-timed, but continued to insist that any return to Australia will take a little while to organise, because it’s not as if there’s daily flights between Honolulu and Australia and it’s not as if the Prime Minister of Australia could get on one tomorrow if he really wanted to or anything.

Morrison referenced the on-going and truly horrific bushfire crisis, which claimed the lives of two RFS firefighters yesterday, stating “These events John are just horrendous. If it was possible to be not where I was this week well, maybe, but ah… this’d been arranged some time ago. I’ll be coming back as soon as I can, it’s not easy to get back.”

He then finally confirmed his long-rumoured whereabouts, stating that he was in Hawaii with family, and that the trip had been a surprise for his family. Remarkably, he admitted he had planned to spend holiday time on the south coast, but stopped just short of copping to the very obvious reason why that was cancelled:

“The girls and Jen, they love holidaying in Hawaii, and so we’ve had a few nice days here, but y’know that’s just where sometimes we go privately for our holidays. Spend a lot of time in Australia on our holidays as well. We had planned to spend it down the South Coast, as we usually did, but we had to bring it forward as I said because of those commitments we had in India and Japan.”

“So we had to tell the girls we wouldn’t be spending as much time down there so in return I tried to give them a bit of a surprise and take them here. I think that’s what Dads try and do if they can when they’ve been working hard all year, and I know there’s lots of Dads and Mums that out there who work hard all year and try and treat their kids at this time of year, and… mate, that’s what just what I was trying to do. It’s just unfortunate that it’s come at such an awful time, particularly for those living in and around Sydney and New South Wales. It’s devastating to be here and see what’s happening there.”

Morrison also claimed he’d “texted” Labor leader Anthony Albanese to let him know that Nationals leader Michael McCormack would be the Acting Prime Minister of Australia for the week, and then asserted “I don’t hold a hose, mate. I don’t sit in a control room,” but that “I know Australians would want me back at this time.”

Ya reckon, m8?

Image: AAP