Matthew Guy Out As VIC Liberal Leader After Humiliating Election Pantsing

After copping an complete and utter pantsing in last weekend’s State Election, tiny mole man Matthew Guy has unceremoniously announced he will be resigning as the leader of the Victorian Liberal Party in a short, terse statement issued via media release only this morning.

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Guy, judged by many to be thoroughly unelectable, ran a scrambling campaign that focused largely on race-baiting and fear-mongering and put on full display just how fundamentally broken the Liberal Party’s current political machine truly is. In contrast, incumbent Premier Daniel Andrews presented actual policy, and was rewarded by Victorian voters with a complete steamrolling of the Liberals, including significant red swings in Liberal heartland that has given the Federal arm of the party the cold sweats.

Today, Matthew Guy, tail between his legs, resigned his post as the leader of the Victorian arm of the party, declaring the party would seek new leadership in the wake of the election turmoil and that he would not be contesting that position.

His full statement – all 110 words of it – reads thusly:

My congratulations again to Premier Andrews and his Labor team for their victory at Saturday’s election.

I would like to place on record my deep appreciation for the hard work of all my Liberal members in the last parliament. They were the most unified team of any parliamentary party in Australia.

I also want to thank and acknowledge the work of so many Liberal candidates, the state secretariat and my own personal staff. They have given up so much and worked so hard.

Now that the parliamentary party has been called together, they will elect a new leadership team. I will not be a candidate for the position of leader.

As far as Australian political discourse goes, Guy will likely serve as something of the canary in the coal mine for the Liberal Party, who is now frantically attempting to figure out just what the hell is going wrong for them; an answer they simply cannot seem to spot, despite the voting public quite literally screaming it in their faces.

In his place, VicLib frontbenchers Michael O’Brien and John Pesutto have been touted as potential replacements. Though Pesutto has an agonising wait ahead of him and still might lose his once-plum seat of Hawthorn, which is yet to be declared. Most recent counts put the margin between incumbent member Pesutto and Labor challenger John Kennedy at just 235 votes, with Pesutto ahead.