A clip has gone viral showing what may as well enter the Aussie bus fight hall of fame. It stars an agro dude threatening to start a fight and yet, not a single blow was dealt for the duration of the video. It’s a true masterclass in working smarter, not harder.
Let us explain.
The clip opens with a guy screaming at another passenger at the back of the bus.
“You wanna have a fucken go, do ya? Well get off the fucken bus, let’s get off and go, fucken go, cunt,” he said, longneck in hand.
We’ve all been there. We’ve all heard this drivel on public transport. We all know how it turns out – or, so we thought.
The man being screamed at appears to acquiesce to the dero’s demands.
He gets up, walks down the aisle of the bus, and stands right next to the door as the vehicle pulls up to a stop.
But then the aggressive dude, in what can only be described as a fit of aggressive rage, barges out the doors first and jumps off the bus, fists at the ready.
The dude who got yelled at simply stays put as the bus doors close. Problem solved.
It’s not clear if the passenger and the driver were in cahoots, but there was definitely ~something~ going on in order to pull off that masterful timing.
The screaming guy tried his best to bang on the doors, but it was too late as the bus was already departing.
“See ya later dickhead!” the triumphant passenger yelled through the glass.
Cue applause from the whole damn bus and from us, behind our screens, too.
The chance encounter left us with a viral video that had all the thrill of a fight on public transport, minus literally all of the actual violence.
Craftily de-escalated bus fights are the way of the future. You heard it here first.