Treason Watch: Beyonce Lip-Synched The Star Spangled Banner

It seems we’ve been Beyo-trayed.

Beyonce Knowles, who turned in a near flawless rendition of the U.S. national anthem at Barack Obama’s inauguration ceremony in Washington yesterday, lied to us through song and Britney Spears’d lip-synched the entire performance, selflessly absorbing at least some of the public contempt held for fellow national traitor Lance Armstrong, invalidating Obama’s second term as President of the United States of America, and killing off several small angels in the process.

A spokesperson for the Marine Corps Band that accompanied her, complicit in a historic national coverup as outrageous as the alleged NASA Moon landing, told TMZ that the singer did not perform live, choosing instead to professionally mouth words over a pre-recorded studio version. The singer “decided at the last minute to rely on the studio version instead of winging it in person,” the spokesperson said.

Needless to say, Beyonce is ridiculously good at lip-synching. We ain’t even mad at ya, it’s actually pretty mpressive.

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