There are *literally* millions of people and things that deserved a Knighthood on Australia Day more than Sir Gaffes-alot: like, I don’t know, the possum that lives in my roof, the broken pedestal fan hanging out on the kerb, my faithful laptop – but there are some truly deserving and outstanding candidates out there that Tone should have awarded with Australia’s highest honour. 

Like this Victorian policeman, spotted cutting sick and stealing the show at the Rainbow Serpent music festival, held on Australia Day

9 News ~broke~ this thrilling story, quoting a festival-goer who witnessed the policeman having an ole boogie: “He was a dead set legend and he was happy to be working at the festival…I talked to him by coincidence hours before just whilst he was on duty and he was having a great day.” How many festival-going bros voluntarily call a cop a “dead set legend”? ‘Ken oath.

Because this is very important, and important news articles need to be thorough, here are three angles of the event, for your viewing pleasure. You’re bloody welcome. 

And another one over at 9 News.