Pharma Bro Martin Shkreli “Quits Rap” After Getting Scammed Out Of $15M

The story has more than a whiff of bullshit about it, but in the hours following yesterday’s frantic announcement – “I NEED MY MONEY BACK THIS ISN’T A FUCKING JOKE” – he has not backed down so much as an inch.

Shkreli could be winding us up with this, but at the same time, he may have actually transferred $15M of his own funds to a random guy named Daquan in a perfect storm of dickheadery, hubris and extreme wealth. WE JUST HAVE NO WAY OF KNOWING.

Yesterday, prior to the launch of Kanye’s Pablo, Shkreli announced that he planned to spend his millions buying up the rights to every major hip hop release of the next few years, to keep them all for himself.

Hip hop will have no major releases from 2016-2017. Mark my words. @shkrelicollection P.S. Where is Tha Carter V?

— Martin Shkreli (@MartinShkreli) February 14, 2016

This morning, he did a rapid about-face, announcing that he is quitting rap entirely, telling Kanye fans he hopes they enjoy his “stupid music”, which has brought him “so much pain and suffering.”

I hope you all enjoy this stupid music SO much and the fact it has brought me so much pain and suffering. I quit rap.

— Martin Shkreli (@MartinShkreli) February 14, 2016

He followed up this epic bedroom door slam by announcing to the world that the joke’s on all of us, because he doesn’t even care about his missing millions 

He then went on to say that he plans to meet with the founder of Bitcoin to help track them down, and the above two statements seem somewhat opposed, but sure:

And second of all I can make the money back faster than anyone so the joke is on YOU if you think I even care.

— Martin Shkreli (@MartinShkreli) February 14, 2016

Also, idiots, I’ve gotten in touch with Sitoshi (Bitcoin’s creator) and he’s agreed to help me get my money back. I always win.

— Martin Shkreli (@MartinShkreli) February 14, 2016

At some point in his Twitter haze, Shkreli announced plans to launch a GoFundMe page, to which we have literally no words: 

Gofundme will be up tomorrow I don’t know what to do omfg

— Martin Shkreli (@MartinShkreli) February 14, 2016

Martin Shkreli might be taking the piss, or he might actually have been scammed out of $15M by a dude named Daquan, but either way, we can’t wait to see where this amazing, batshit Twitter meltdown takes him next.