I was way too old to be watching The Saddle Club when it aired on Aussie TV. Like, 16 years of age too old. Regardless, the show – which centred around a bunch of tweens who were obsessed with horses and their horse-riding club – really made my HSC-studying arvos.
The show was a Canadian-Australian creation, which still confuses me and literally just meant there were a few ‘Aboot’ types in the cast? Whatever. Who cares! It was great, there was plenty of batshit kids-TV drama, and a few fantastic love stories for good measure.
Here’s all the best moments you’ve probably forgotten. FYI, I have not gone near Season 3 because they booted the existing cast, it aired like 5 years later, and literally no one cares the end.
THE VERONICA-PHIL-STEVIE LOVE TRIANGLE
In episode two of the first season, there’s this epic love triangle between bitchy Veronica, Stevie and this absolute CHILD Phil. I know they’re all kids but honestly, as a fully-grown adult woman it is so hard to harken back to the time where we developed crushes on boys that looked like this:
Anyway, while Veronica has an entire batshit dream sequence where she froths Phil, he only has eyes for Stevie. So in a sort of heartbreak moment, Veronica gallops off on her own – only to be thrown off her horse and be left bruised in the middle of the wilderness. The Saddle Club make the TERRIBLE decision to go look for her themselves, alone, without Max. Poor fucking Max, all these shithead kids thinking they can save the day. These wild dogs (!!!) then show up, and it’s Lisa that saves the day with what is basically a rape whistle. Wild.
RED GETS FIRED FOR THE BARN FIRE
Anything with fire is gonna be a good damn episode of what is otherwise a pretty low-budget and frankly shitty TV show. In this one, Jake accidentally starts a barn fire after forgetting to bring in some hay. He lets people blame Red for the fire (RUDE) resulting in Max firing Red. All of course ends well however after Jake admits he made the boo boo and quits.
DEB PROPOSES TO MAX WHO PROPOSES TO DEB
Ahhhh yes the old proposal japes! Max tells The Saddle Club (why) that he wants to propose to Deb. Unbeknownst to all of them, Deb already had plans to propose to Max!!!! HILARITY ENSUES. Also includes great line “I may not be the horse woman of your dreams”.
THE HEADLESS HORSEMAN
This is about as spooky as Saddle Club would ever get – the girls learn that 100 years ago, Max’s great-grandfather William died after having his head chopped off (guys, this was a show for kids. JFC.) becoming “The Headless Horseman”. ORIGINAL. Anyway, the girls end up seeing him in the barn twice – but it turns out to be Max playing a seriously sadistic prank on some ACTUAL CHILDREN. Then at the end there’s a real ghost but who cares.
STEVIE AND PHIL KISS
The finale of Season 1 was INTENSE – Lisa falls off Prancer and winds up in a coma! Prancer appearing at her hospital window wakes her from it! The wedding of Max & Deb is off! Then it’s back on! Hoo boy, hard to keep up. But the best part is absolutely Stevie and Phil’s KISS. Sure they’re like 13 years old and it’s kind of creepy! We waited ALL SEASON for this bloody show of affection you guys. And it was worth it.
THE CLUB FORMS A TERRIBLE BAND
Scooter – my favourite ever character – decides the Saddle Club have great voices and he will get them a record contract. It’s all pretty boring (Veronica tries to be in the band! blah blah) until the end, where the girls perform ‘Wonderland’, a song that is just horse references. They also wear phenomenally early ’00s disco gear to to it.
THE ENTIRE ‘LOVE IS IN THE AIR’ EPISODE
The absolute best thing about The Saddle Club was the cheesy romances, and the ‘Love Is In The Air’ episode brought that in spades. There’s Red and Dorothee’s blossoming romance based around him making her want to ride horses again, but the stand-out is Stevie and Phil’s first date – before which Stevie has an identity crisis and goes to get a makeover (see above for terrifying Toddlers & Tiaras result). Eventually she realises she’s ~perfect as she is~ and they have a cute date.
DOROTHEE FUCKS OFF
Ah, Dorothee and Red. A love that sadly lasted about 4 episodes – because Dorothee decides to gallivant off to… wherever she was from (France???) and restart her burgeoning showjumping career. RIP. Well, RIP their love.
THE BOYS VS. GIRLS CAMPING TRIP
This episode had everything – rumours of Yowies in the bush, a house collapsing on someone, pranks galore… eventually the girls won bc they spotted Liam eating a choccy bar in Scooter’s video of the trip. Their prize? A large pizza with all the toppings.
THE DANCE
I mean, the absolute line of the show is part of this episode, coming from Kristi: “If it weren’t for Red, there’d be no decent boys in the horse world”. So it had to be included. But as I already said, the best part of The Saddle Club was the romances, and this ep delivered in spades. We have Carole giving new guy David a makeover so he finds the confidence to ask out Lisa – except then Carole falls for him! Aaaand we have the start of Veronica/Scooter – my favourite romance in all of Saddle Club history.
PINE HOLLOW UP FOR SALE
The season finale of S2 was WILD – are the Regnery’s going to lose Pine Hollow? Will the nasty antiques lady fuck over the club with her fake-ass pricing of a very fancy old book or whatever? And MOST IMPORTANTLY – WILL SCOOTER AND VERONICA KISS. They do, by the way – on their v. cute first date.
I’m not even doing Season 3 because it sucked and also came out in 2008, and didn’t feature the original cast – WTF? No. Bye.
