Just Gonna Say It: Fuck The Window Seat On Planes, The Aisle Seat Is Where The Party’s At

aisle seat vs window seat

For years, films, TV shows, books and photos have gaslit us into romanticising the window seat of a plane. Today, I shall humbly yet passionately make the case that window seat superiority is a complete crock of shit. The true unsung hero of air travel is, without a shadow of a doubt, the aisle seat.

Australia is a big country. You could sooner fly from Melbourne to most cities in New Zealand than to Perth or Darwin.

Because of this, each time we travel by plane, even if it’s between Sydney and Melbourne our two most populous cities, most of us will spend at least one and a half hours cooped up in the aerial cattle ranch that is an economy class row of seats.

Now I’m not hating on economy-class. No sir.

I’ve only flown business-class twice in my life and both those times it was because I bid a shockingly low price for an upgrade and somehow still got it.

The second of these two business-class trips was with Rex Airlines. It goes without saying that this is a paradox in and of itself. Imagine my surprise when I found out Rex… actually had business-class.

Regardless, the reality for most of us is that we’ll be flying economy most of the time. And in economy, there are few comforts and luxuries to speak of.

There’s no hot towel, no three-course meal, no chair-that-turns-into-a-bed to lie down in and CERTAINLY no one to tuck you in when you want a nap.

Given these conditions, you’ve gotta think outside the box to make bearable what will normally be a few hour’s worth of domestic Australian air travel. Oh, and don’t even get me started on international flight durations…

The beauty of the aisle seat is simple: it’s freeing.

The ability to hop up and go for a walk at any moment is there for the taking.

The proximity required to ask the attendants anything with relative ease (and without having to lean across of do an awkward semi-yell) is within your grasp.

Need anything from the overhead locker? Just stand up and grab it. Simples!

Over the course of a multi-hour flight, there are really only two occasions when having a window seat is superior: takeoff and landing.

And in the grand scheme of things, they amount to a relatively small proportion of the overall flight time.

Moreover, the only things capable of being seen out a window are the clouds (boring) and the sky (which you can see from the ground).

Your bum deserves the best. So logically, the aisle seat is the superior seat in which to plant it.

If you disagree you are either a) wrong, or b) way too into clouds.