PEDESTRIAN.TV has partnered with Samsung to get you some absolutely ludicrous zooms.

While absolutely necessary, I think it’s fair to say isolation is driving everyone a little loopy. It’s a weird time, but we should all lean into the skid I reckon. Embrace the weird and demented thoughts that spring forth from your socially deprived minds lest they drive you into despair. If you don’t laugh, you’ll cry, etc.

How am I leaning into the skid? Pretty much any way I possibly can. The latest, however, is by finding ways to amuse myself during work hours, so when Samsung sent me the new Galaxy S20 smartphone to try out, I sure as hell tried it out. And by tried it out, I mean I used its ludicrous 100x zoom feature to enhance my entire existence.

If you’re keen to get one for yourself, you just might be able to do it for exactly ZERO DOLLARS. All you have to do is find the tiny, teensy Microcodes Samsung has hidden in some of its advertisements to win a Galaxy S20 Ultra 5G. You can check out some more details and examples at the link below.

Ten more codes are going to hit very soon, so follow the Samsung social channels to be the first to find one. 

Moving right along, let me show how wild this zoom is.

At-home binoculars

I no longer have to get up to read things far away from me. As a glasses-wearing denizen of the community, this is like being gifted with superpowers.

Allow me to demonstrate. Here’s a picture of my kitchen from where I work at home.

Nothing special, sure, but I would really like to see the picture on my favourite birthday present mug. In a pre-Galaxy S20 world, I’d have to get up and walk over to the shelf, maybe even put my glasses on. Not anymore, baby! Get a load of this.

Yes, that is a picture of me. What of it? See anything else in that image worth looking at?

Yes, my good friend and housemate Owliver.

Don’t let his size fool you, he radiates powerful druid energy which helps me maintain sanity during isolation.

The find Owliver game

Owliver demands I play a game with him at least twice a day to keep his ancient magic strong. It’s essentially a game of Hide and Seek but he calls it “The Mystic Reappearing” and gets really stroppy if you call it anything else. I dare not push him on the subject, I still don’t know the full extent of his abilities.

Anyway, the Galaxy S20 makes The Mystic Reappearing heaps easier because I can do it from pretty much anywhere. Here’s an example from earlier today.

Can you see Owliver? Let me make it a little easier.

How about now?

He always hides in there. I’ve tried explaining that a spot becomes less effective the more he uses it, but old mate won’t have a bar of it.

Checking on the coffee line

I’m not leaving the house much at the moment, but when I do, it’s usually for coffee. I’ve been trying to drink more instant coffee to limit these trips, although Owliver scolds me if he sees. He thinks instant coffee is for “dirty normies,” but this is coming from a guy who reckons he’s “transcended” any and all need for caffeine by “channelling the dark powers of the void” so what would he know?

Anyway, having the Galaxy S20 means I only have to walk half the distance to the cafe to check the line before I commit to waiting. Look at it. LOOK.

ENHANCE.

Sweet, it looks like there are only two (2) dogs and their human in the line. Time for a quick refuel before Owliver gives me a hard time about it.

Spying on Owliver

Look, I hate to be nosy, but there have been all sorts of weird yahoos coming from the end of my hallway followed by the smell of smoke. I think Owliver has been starting fires inside but flat-out denies it when I ask him.

I try not to ask questions because his abilities are obviously keeping me sane in these trying times, but the last thing I need is for my house to burn down so I thought I’d snap a quick pic next time I heard him going off to see exactly what he’s been getting up to.

What is he doing?

What the…

NO!!! That’s like a bonfire for him!

Anyway, the Galaxy S20 is great for keeping an eye on your weird housemates.

Image: @mopkins88