Wati Holmwood, deceptively agile naturalist of rotund physique and impressively even all over body tan whose try-saving tackle interrupted the final few minutes of this year’s State of Origin series decider in Sydney, has been sentence to three months in prison for crimes against children’s eyeballs.
Magistrate Christopher Longley sentenced the serial streaker to three months in prison for breaching two good behaviour bonds, one of which related to prior instances of streaking at a West Tigers vs New Zealand Warriors game in 2011, as well as charges relating to the Sydney man’s lap of dishonour at Origin.
Holmwood pleaded guilty to running onto the field of play without pants authorisation and indecent exposure. He was also fined $2000 and handed lifetime bans by the NRL and ANZ Stadium.
Holmwood, who failed to appear at sentencing in Sydney last week, is expected to appeal the decision with his legal representation arguing that he had “limited intellect” and no means “of marking the passage of time” because he didn’t own a phone or a calendar.
I mean, sure, it’s not like the dude has pockets.
