It’s with absolutely zero shame that I can say the only part of the Commonwealth Games I’ve watched is the following six seconds consisting of your new favourite athlete – 24-year-old Australian steeplechase runner and newly-minted legend Genevieve LaCaze – wandering onto the stage during the Closing Ceremony to perform a very adequate two-step with Kylie Minogue’s shirtless dancing troupe during a costume change.
It’s her birthday, too. 
Once more, with resounding pride, a half-hearted flag wave and a glazed over expression before security escorts you off-stage: ‘STRAYA.
Photo by Ian Walton/Getty Images
