After a good old fashioned barbie with out-of-town mates including Bazza and Ange – for which he did a run to the special, fancy deli to pick up Moreton Bay bugs, Flinders Island lamb and Tasmanian ocean trout – your Uncle Tones got a bit emotional, then gathered the troops for one of his legendary speeches. 

He told them about the bloody ripper year he’s had, and while some felt he waffled on a bit too long about his accomplishments – Cousin Bill was heard to mutter something about his “weird and graceless” performance – he was full of pride to have such a “very influential” group of mates in his own back yard. 

That Tones is incorrigible.