In my personal opinion, Donald Trump‘s Twitter account was better only four sweet years ago, when he would regularly tweet about Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattison‘s relationship troubles like he actually knew them (but didn’t).
I mean, now he still incessantly tweets inane rants, but now it’s repetitive boring crap about media outlets lacking integrity simply because they dare to post op-eds criticising him. RIP 2012, you were a better time.
However, every now and then Donald tweets something hilarious again. Today, he’s decided to do a little hate-tweet about Vanity Fair, and their editor, Graydon Carter.
Has anyone looked at the really poor numbers of @VanityFair Magazine. Way down, big trouble, dead! Graydon Carter, no talent, will be out!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 15, 2016
Why? Well, it took a moment for people to figure out why the hell he’d all of a sudden chosen to violently despise one of the biggest fashion and culture magazines in the world. Perhaps they’d interviewed Cara Delevingne and she’d called him a twat?
Turns out, no. It turns out that Trump is Very Mad™ with the mag, because they reviewed his restaurant, Trump Grill. And they didn’t like it very much. They did not like it very much at all.
In a review titled ‘Trump Grill Could Be The Worst Restaurant In America‘, author Tina Nguyen tells the reader,
“Renowned butcher Pat LaFrieda once dared me to eat an eyeball that he himself popped out of the skull of a roasted pig.That eyeball tasted better than the Trump Grill’s (Grille’s) Gold Label Burger, a Pat LaFrieda–branded short-rib burger blend moulded into a sad little meat thing, sitting in the centre of a massive, rapidly staling brioche bun, hiding its shame under a slice of melted orange cheese.”
Here’s some other highlights:
“The allure of Trump’s restaurant, like the candidate, is that it seems like a cheap version of rich.”“features a stingy number of French-ish paintings that look as though they were bought from Home Goods.”“I asked the waiter what Trump’s children eat. He didn’t seem to understand the question, or, like Marco Rubio, appeared unable to depart from his prescribed talking points.“Oh, I’ve shaken hands with him before, and they’re pretty normal-sized hands,” he responded.”“If the cheeseburger is a quintessential part of America’s identity, Trump’s pledge to “make America great again” suddenly appeared not very promising. (Presumably, Trump’s Great America tastes like an M.S.G.-flavored kitchen sponge lodged between two other sponges.)”“‘Dago’s famous guacamole’, which NASA might have served in a tube labeled “TACO FILLING” in the early days of the space program.”
So in conclusion – Trump very angry.
But Vanity Fair don’t seem to mind that much. Ever since Trump‘s slam tweet appeared, this has been the new header on the website:
NICE.
If you want to read the full review in all its sassy glory, you can here: vanityfair.com/news/2016/12/trump-grill-review?mbid=social_twitter
Source: Vanity Fair / Twitter.
Photo: Stephen Lovekin / Getty.
