Former Labor senator Sam Dastyari has emerged from a thick cloud of snack packs and disgrace to weigh in on embattled deputy prime minister Barnaby Joyce‘s trials and tribulations as he faces scrutiny over the exact circumstances of an affair he conducted with staffer Vikki Campion.
Joyce’s affair had apparently been regarded by press gallery journalists as something of an ‘open secret’ for a long period of time, but the floodgates were opened when the Daily Tele published a front-page story about Campion and Joyce expecting a child together. In a quick flurry, further reports came out about how Campion had been moved to another role in another MPs office when tensions became a problem, with some questioning whether this violated the ministerial code of conduct (the government dismissed this by playing some very strange semantic games with the word “partner“).
Dastyari, mostly known for his deep and abiding love of memes and adopting positions on the South China Sea that veer wildly from that of his party but align mysteriously well with foreign donors from whom he was taking money, is apparently under the impression that he’s spent enough time in exile (a few months) and is ready to start weighing in on politics again.
Hey Twitter – am I allowed back ? (So much to say about Barnaby)
— Sam Dastyari (@samdastyari) February 12, 2018
Dastyari proceeded to say that everyone knew about the affair and that Campion being given the job was very clearly misconduct:
Everyone. And I mean EVERYONE in Federal Parliament knew about Vicki and Barnaby. Anyone who claims they didn’t know Is either bullshitting or so out of touch they shouldn’t be in Parliament. The job relocation is a clear breach of the rules. We all assumed it would come out during the by-election. For fucks sale – how can you construe the pregnant woman Barnaby left his wife for as NOT his ‘partner’. Who was she then?????
He followed up by telling Joyce to call it and quit, and telling Julie Bishop that if the Coalition is going to try out people doing similar things in the Labor Party, he’d spill on what he believes to be happening with everyone else.
Hey @Barnaby_Joyce, I went for a LOT less. Quit while you are behind. Trust me – it only gets a LOT worse from here.
— Sam Dastyari (@samdastyari) February 12, 2018
And @JulieBishopMP with reference to “glass houses” – I’m totally out of Parliament so very happy to go “tit-for-tat” for every Conservative fucking around. BRING IT ON (seriously, I’m sooooo bored)
— Sam Dastyari (@samdastyari) February 12, 2018
He also took the time to cheekily thank his supporters:
To all the many many people who have taken the time to send me encouraging and lovely private messages on Twitter – I just want to say: I LOVE YOU 💋. Or, as they say in China: 我爱你.
— Sam Dastyari (@samdastyari) February 12, 2018
Look, Dastyari is not, by any stretch of the imagination, the first politician to change a position thanks to the influence of donors – if the politicians or parties who held stances that contravened anything they had previously supported due to the influence of corporate donors were held to the same level of scrutiny, there wouldn’t be that many people left in Parliament – but it still seems a bit naff to be so casual about the embarrassingly massive misconduct you were proven to be undertaking.
Who needs actual self-awareness when you have memes?
