Bondi Beach was surfing the crimson wave


Bondi Beach Tamarama, Bronte, Clovelly, Coogee and Maroubra Beach have gone and turned themselves red. Causing them to be likened to tomato juice, Jaws’ feeding frenzy ground and sea-menstruation. Go-Go Tourism Sydney!

A spokesman for the Metropolitan Sydney South Coast and Hunter Regional Algal Co-ordinating Committees, James Muddle, said “it looks pretty fucking cool, huh? Oh, you don’t think so? Do you even lift, brah?! Come fight me IRL!”

No. He didn’t.

He said the bloom was caused by a “nutrient rich deep ocean water onto the continental shelf.” The algae, Noctiluca scintillans or ‘sea sparkle,’ enjoys plankton, fish eggs, bacteria and long walks on the beach. It is also bioluminescent, meaning – beach rave?

This amazing slideshow has surfaced – I particularly love the zoom-in/zoom-out effect they have used. Not sure what it’s called. Inbox me if you know.

According to Waverley Life guard head Bruce Hopkins “it has got quite a fishy smell to it.” Cannot confirm nor deny but that could just be the ocean itself. More specifically, the fish in the ocean. Smell aside, you would undoubtedly feel pretty un-okay swimming in it, unless of course you are accustomed to bathing nightly in the blood of virgins a la Queen of the Damned and Madonna.

It can cause some irritation to human skin and eyes, which is why the beaches were temporarily closed, but is not dangerous. Probably do avoid drinking the red Kool-Aid, though.

via SMH
via Mother Nature
Images by William West for Getty

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