Barnaby Joyce Fully Flips It, Would Not Stop Saying ‘Carp’ In QT Today

By

Cam Tyeson

Published

Politics is a bloody weird thing sometimes, you guys.

And while our beloved Deputy Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce is certainly no stranger to providing the occasional odd moment, this one… well, it’s probably the strangest.
Murray River Carp are a very real problem for the extraordinarily delicate eco-system of the Murray-Darling. European Carp in the system are considered vermin, and cost the economy an estimated $500million per year.
In order to combat this, the Federal Government has unveiled a plan that will see a specific strain of the herpes virus introduced into the waters. The strain, developed and researched extensively by the CSIRO, affects no other species of fish, and is highly effective at targeting both European and ornamental koi carp. The $15million plan would see as much as 95% of the carp population in the system wiped out over the next 30 years.
Reasonably straightforward idea, right?
Except you can’t drop the word “herpes” around politicians and expect them to keep a straight face, as Senator Nick Xenophon discovered.

But in Question Time, Barnaby Joyce’s brain appears to have completely and utterly melted.

In lambasting the opposition, Joyce latched on to the word “carp” and would not let go for anything.
Carp.
Caaaaaaaaarrrrrp.
CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRP.

Let’s isolate that down to just the key words, yeah?

…

I mean, we…
We’re at a loss here. This might be the single-most fully cooked speech delivered under this Government.
Barnaby. Mate. Might be time for a few deep breaths and a lie down.
But if nothing else, Canberra just scored itself a bangin’ new ringtone.

A rose in a field of CAAAARP.


Source: Twitter.
Photo: Stefan Postles/Getty.

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