I don’t pretend to be an expert on fashion. I know that I like my t-shirts to have one big hole at the bottom and three smaller ones at the top and I know that jeans work best when they are about foot-height shy of being the length of my legs. That is the sum of my expertise. I can tell you, though, with absolute confidence and surety, that Harry Styles wore some deeply wack shoes to the ARIAs tonight.
I don’t even have the language to describe these. Are they some sort of dress croc? They look like a cross between a traditional Dutch clog and those square-toed pointy shoes every dude was pairing with their skinny tie in 2009. Gaze upon these beasts with your own two eyes:
@Harry_Styles burn these shoes pic.twitter.com/Kdpp00vHjb
— ellie 🫶🏾 (@crueIjimin) November 28, 2017
Clearly the ultimate footwear for if you intend to combine a formal occasion with a brief walk around the surface of the moon. The court of public opinion was not exceptionally generous to these boxy zapatos:
https://twitter.com/ashleighruberto/status/935396072481898496
tf harry’s shoes are so ugly
— mate (@angelsmorphine) November 28, 2017
https://twitter.com/fentease/status/935391108825337856
https://twitter.com/fionnjh/status/935422917545836544
But seriously those are the ugliest shoes harry has ever worn
— nadia (@mygucciangel) November 28, 2017
listen… that suit is impeccable but the shoes.. harry sweetie
— 🤩 (@musicforsushii) November 28, 2017
Although it was not universal (uh, sort of?):
https://twitter.com/hesfinish/status/935402674731868163
They may look terrible now, but we’ll see who’s laughing when in 3 years time the trend in men’s shoes is making them the size of a moonboot and the colour of Goldmember‘s clothes.
