It’s happening folks: the trailer for the Zoey 101 reboot, creatively titled Zoey 102, is here and it looks so terrible, I simply cannot WAIT to watch it for my next girls’ night in. I’m foaming at the mouth in wretched glee.
The premise of the Paramount+ movie, which genuinely feels like it came out in 2007 (an elite time for trashy, yet iconic, chick flicks), is that our titular Zoey Brooks (Jamie Lynn Spears) must reunite with her high school pals from the Nickelodeon series after one of them makes her the maid of honour at her wedding.
But, would it really be a 2000s series reboot if the plot wasn’t completely unhinged? Of course not. Peep the trailer below.
Zoey, now 30 years old, is the definition of peaked in high school: she’s still chasing the popularity status she had when she was 15 years old, hasn’t seriously dated anyone since her Zoey 101 love interest Chase (Sean Flynn), and won’t shut TF up about how much better high school was than her current life.
In order to seem ~cool~ to the people she hasn’t been friends with since she was in, like, year nine, Zoey decides to hire a very hot man called Hugo Hemsworth (not played by an actual Hemsworth, despite the Aussie accent), who also doubles as a means to make Chase jealous because somehow Zoey still has feelings for him almost two decades later.
Zoey is fkn tragic, you guys. How the mighty fall.
Obviously, this film looks like dreadful.
However, some of it does kill me in the best way: did you clock that the iconic pear phones are gone, to be replaced with these cursed things?
Like I said, this movie is wild. I would expect nothing less from Jamie Lynn Spears, its executive producer.
However, will I be eagerly awaiting its arrival? Surrounded by the very girls that used to collectively drool over Chase and and desperately ship him with Zoey back in 2005? While we all eat off a charcuterie board and look up old gossipy columns about our fave heartthrobs of the time?
Yes, yes I will. Does anyone know what Gordo from Lizzie McGuire is up to these days? He was meant to be in the Lizzie McGuire reboot movie, but alas, that was canned, and this film wasn’t. We truly live in the darkest timeline.
Zoey 102 will premiere on Paramount+ on July 27th, where all the old seasons are currently streaming.