Grief is such a funny little emotion.
Sometimes it can feel completely earth-shattering, and other times, it’s just a bump in the road. But if there’s one thing I’ve recently learnt about grief, it’s that no matter how much time has passed, it doesn’t completely go away. It just unfolds.
While there’s no right way to deal with it, many of us have discovered the hard way that there are ways to deal with the complexities of grief that aren’t exactly beneficial to our wellbeing.
In the new Stan Original Series, Totally Completely Fine, we see just that.
The Aussie comedy follows 20-something Vivian Cunningham (Thomasin McKenzie) who is, to put it nicely, a walking hot mess. She can’t pay her rent, she’s living in a shitty little sharehouse and has a teeeny bit of a drinking problem. And to top it all off, last week she accidentally burnt down her brother’s food truck with a bacon flavoured vape.
If the vape flavour doesn’t indicate how messed up her life is, I don’t know what will.
But Vivian’s out-of-control life suddenly takes a turn when her grandfather passes away and she inherits his coastal cliff top property.
At first, she thinks she’s absolutely scored in the abysmal Sydney housing market… until she discovers that the cliff her grandad’s house is situated on is also a known spot where people end their lives.
Now, it’s up to her to try and talk people down from the edge, even if there’s a part of her that also feels like she’s on the edge.
You see, after being the only survivor of a car crash that killed her parents when she was 10-years-old, Vivian has lived with the grief following her around. As an adult, it seems to be manifesting in some pretty self-destructive ways. So with a fiercely nihilistic attitude, a dose mental illness and her own demons to work through, Vivian is not exactly the picture perfect idea of a guardian angel.
But, according to the series creator, Gretel Vella, that’s the whole point.
“When we imagine or read about the types of people who guard sites like the one in Totally Completely Fine, they’re all really similar — outstanding citizens, with great social skills, who also have a knack for getting to the bottom of other people’s problems,” Gretel told PEDESTRIAN.
“Don’t get me wrong, I think that’s great, but I was more interested in what someone who was very depressed and anxious themselves might bring to this type of role.”
“While mental illness can be a huge burden for the person suffering with it, I often also see mine as an integral part of who I am — one that gifts me with a much richer sense of empathy and understanding,” she continued.
She went on to explain that she was “fascinated by the idea of putting someone on our screens who might traditionally be deemed a ‘mess’, who ultimately found that the traits she’d seen as wholly a burden could also be her greatest superpower.”
She added, “I think representations like this are super important, and might work to remove some of the stigma around how we talk about and depict mental illness.”
Despite the subject matter being kind of heavy, the Stan Original Series doesn’t pull any punches in the comedy space. Because, well, if you don’t laugh, you’ll cry, right?
“It’s so true of the human experience that sometimes in the midst of our pain and suffering we do ridiculous things to cope or find ourselves laughing as a means to heal,” Vella said. “I think ultimately audiences will relate to this, and it really is the spirit and beating heart of the show.”
Watching Totally Completely Fine was a poignant experience for me as some of the themes are relevant to my life at the moment.
Recently a friend of mine went into palliative care, and despite the situation, that gal has not lost her amazing sense of humour. Being able to have a laugh with her in light of everything is something I will always cherish.
When I watched this series, what hit me was how authentic Vivian’s experience of grief felt. Because she’s not just a gal sobbing on the floor about her parents’ and grandfather’s deaths like is so often depicted on screen. She’s a multifaceted gal who has a wicked sense of humour and truly wants better for herself, even if that goal feels out of reach.Ultimately, grief isn’t a linear experience and Stan’s Original Series Totally Completely Fine helped me feel seen for feeling like a huge fucking mess right now.
You can watch Totally Completely Fine, only on Stan now. You can also check out our list of the best TV shows on Stan here.
If you need mental health support, please call Lifeline on 13 11 14 or chat online.
Under 25? You can reach Kids Helpline at 1800 55 1800 or chat online.
You can also reach the Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467 or chat online.
If you require immediate assistance, please call 000.
