Wild ‘Friends’ Theory Suggests Ross Is Only There ’Cos He’s Monica’s Brother

First things first, Ross Geller absolutely, unequivocally sucks. He’s a whingey pissbaby who thinks it’s okay to be incredibly possessive of others, make moves on his cousin, made a move on (who he believed to be) a completely legless Rachel (which turns out to be his sister), and did that little thing where he just “forgot” to get an annulment with Rachel – pretty sure that one’s like, extremely illegal but ya know.


A theory posited by US comedian Emily Heller has set Friends fans ablaze – what if Ross is only Monica‘s brother as a method to keep him in the show instead of Carol, his ex-wife (and noted good person) after their divorce?

Ok let’s break it down, because it’s 4.30pm on a Monday and this needs to be done.

In the beginning, there was Ross, Monica, Chandler and Phoebe. We can assume that Ross and Carol were married at this point, before Ben was born, and before Carol realised her sexual identity.

Now, when Joey and Rachel enter the group, Ross is on the brink of his divorce. Rachel and Monica are old friends, so Rachel at this point has no loyalty to Ross – because friends’ brothers can be total dipshits. Joey has no loyalty to anyone, really, so he’s entering the group with fresh eyes. And though Ross and Chandler are old friends from college, looking at the relationship that Chandler forms with Joey – he’d probably choose Joey every time.

If Ross were not Monica’s sister, it’s pretty easy to see that he would have been lost in the divorce, and the five ~friends~ would have kept Carol as their sixth mate.

Anyway, here’s me.

Understandably, fans of the show have not taken this observation lightly, and hell hath no fury like agitated Ross stans (yep, they exist).



Honestly, this whole thing put me into a weird Friends hole where I think I’d prefer Marcel the monkey over everyone and I also ended up over here at this weird Riverdale cross-over, which is…a whole time.