Valentine’s Day has rolled around once again, folks, and whether you’re dateless this year or not, I bet you wish you could spend the night with your dream (albeit fictional) man.
I know, I know. It’s totally pathetic to fantasise this hard about guys who only exist on television.
But considering the amount of time I spend bingeing these shows on Stan, you can’t blame me for low-key feeling like I’m actually in a relationship with them.
So to celebrate the most romantic night of the year, here’s a list of all the TV lads I wish I could take out on a date this Friday.
1. Mark Sloan AKA McSteamy – Grey’s Anatomy
We spent the greater part of the noughties debating which Grey’s Anatomy doctor we’d rather do: McDreamy (Patrick Dempsey) or McSteamy (Dane).
From the get-go, my choice has always been McSteamy.
His cheeky, irreverent, playboy vibe was a total mood and I don’t want to spoil things for people who haven’t seen it but a few character-defining events throughout the series had me falling hard for him.
And my final, and perhaps most convincing point, includes a visual aid:
No offence whatsoever to Derek, he’s still a v. fine choice and I’m sure he’d be a perfect gentleman on a V-Day date, but Meredith (Ellen Pompeo) can have him, I want McSteamy!
2. Will Truman – Will & Grace
Sure, he’s totally neurotic and sarcastic but let’s focus on his positive traits, shall we?
Will Truman (Eric McCormack) is super organised so he’d plan one helluva V-Day date.
He always pays for his friends’ meals so if we go out for dins he’ll no doubt be plonking down his credit card.
And if it’s a stay-in date, he’ll likely prepare a fabulous meal as he’s always seen in the kitchen whipping up a tasty dish, so I can sit back while he does all the work.
3. Mike Hannigan – Friends
Are ya shook that I didn’t pick one of the main three dudes?
Look, I’ve always said this: Friends is one of those shows where every single lead character is a necessary piece of the puzzle. While I prefer some more than others, I genuinely LOVE all six characters.
But to me the Friends characters are just that: friends (in the fictional sense, of course).
So for V-Day, I wanna be taken out on a date by a character who I’ve always been crushing on, Mike Hannigan (played by the eternally 30-something-year-old, Paul Rudd).
Not only is the character a total cutie, he is also hilarious, musically gifted and treats Phoebe (Lisa Kudrow) like a qween.
Mr. Crap Bag, will you be my Valentine?
4. Seth Cohen – The O.C.
Fresh from my teenage bedroom wall comes my next prime pick, The O.C. dreamboat Seth Cohen (Adam Brody).
Never in my life have I wanted a fictional character to be real more than I do with Seth – like, oh my god.
If handsome geeks are your vibe, you’ll definitely know what it’s like to fall head over heels with this quirky, charming, cheesy, slow-dancing, cartoon-drawing, beautiful weirdo.
Step aside Summer (Rachel Bilson), Cohen’s mine for the night.
5. Jax Teller – Sons of Anarchy
There have been a lot of cute goofballs on this list but every now and then you have to throw a bad boi into the mix, right?
And they don’t get much badder than a long-haired, tattooed bikie like Sons of Anarchy’s Jax Teller (Charlie Hunnam).
If the aforementioned traits plus the load of shirtless scenes the series has blessed us with aren’t enough to convince you, how about the fact that he is an excellent father and partner to his high school sweetheart?
Brains, braun and a heart?
The only question remaining is: What time will he be picking me up on his motorcycle?
6. Damon Salvatore – The Vampire Diaries
While we’re on the bad boy train, how about one with fangs?
I know what you’re thinking, in a series with two hot vampire brothers, why am I choosing the more evil of the two?
Stefan (Paul Wesley) is a total catch, sure, but Damon is definitely the darker and more mysterious of the two which should make for a spicy Valentine’s Day evening.
7. Leo Wyatt – Charmed
If you totally disagree with my bad boy Damon Salvatore argument and would rather go with a sweet magical boi, then how about a literal angel?
Not only was Leo Wyatt (Brian Krause) a fierce protector of our girls for the entirety of Charmed, but he was also one helluva boyfriend-turned-husband for Piper (Holly Marie Combs).
Plus he has the ability to orb (or teleport, for the Charmed newbies) up above the clouds which would make a sweet-as date spot, right?
And best of all, you don’t need to wait around for him to pick you up like you would with a regular date, all you needa do is call his name loudly and BAM, he appears. Pretty cool, huh?
8. Andy Dyer – Parks & Recreation
Time for a goofy palette cleanser.
Every Chris Pratt fan I know prefers his cute, cuddly vibe more than his current, more chiselled era, and I have to agree.
But this list is all about fictional characters (‘coz I have more of a chance with them than with Chris Pratt, let’s be real) and when you weigh up all the roles he’s played, I’ll always have a soft spot for Andy.
So given the choice to be taken out on a date by superhero Pratt or shoe-shiner Pratt, I’d have to go with Andy!
9. & 10. Sam and / or Dean – Supernatural
I can’t speak for all die-hard Supernatural fans, but I personally cannot choose between the Winchester brothers, Sam (Jared Padalecki) and Dean (Jensen Ackles).
The demon-fighting duo have vastly different personalities: Sam is more soft-hearted and loving while Dean is gritty and sarcastic.
But both are devilishly handsome, super protective, have a killer taste in music and would make an excellent date for V-Day.
So how about this?
Dinner with sweet-as-pie Sam and drinks with bourbon-loving Dean. Done deal.