Someone fetch me a container of Vanish Napisan for my shirt ‘cos tonight’s final MAFS dinner party has made me sweat like I’ve never sweat before.
The drama! The chaos! The passive aggressiveness! The sheer fuckery from Cam! I was on the edge of my seat and actually fell off at one point. I am typing this from the floor.
Tonight the MAFS experts dropped off honesty boxes so that the the guinea pigs couples could ask each other hard-hitting and deeply personal questions in front of an audience, medium rare steak and bread. You know what they say! Honesty is best served with side salad.
Cam really took this to heart by telling Lyndall — for the first time, mind you — that he doesn’t know if she’ll fit into his life in the Northern Territory. But also that doesn’t mean she won’t fit into parts of his lifestyle, which makes no sense.
The good people of Twitter were mad that Cam kept making excuses about his inability to show affection and his “remote work” shitola. As they should be.
Cameron is a gronk, but we knew this already #mafs #mafsau
— Everybody Wang Chung Tonight !🇳🇴🇮🇸🇬🇩 (@Yes_IamSancho) March 22, 2023
Lyndal 100% got more hugs from Cameron’s dog at home stay then Lyndal got from the whole experiment from Cameron #mafs #MAFSAU
— Amber Erin 🧸 (@ambiibambi24) March 22, 2023
So Dan is married to the ocean and Cam’s married to the bush.. got it #MAFSAU #MAFS
— Lodz 🦋 (@sumwheresmiling) March 22, 2023
Cam can go make a wife out of desert sand #MAFS #MAFSAU #MAFSAustralia #MarriedAtFirstSight
— dr mimi🦇 (@drmimip) March 22, 2023
Then the bloke was like, “Hold my Great Northern!” ‘cos he announced he loves Lyndall as a person, but he couldn’t see himself falling in love with her. Between him and Bunnings Boofhead (TYSM Evelyn for this one), it’s really the Gronk Olympics on MAFS.
Folks were equal parts “WTF” and “I saw this coming” because from what we’ve seen, Cam has made it clear that he doesn’t like like Lyndall. And when I say “made it clear”, I mean he’s refused to compromise, make an effort and give her clear indications — physical or otherwise — that he cares for her. He’s also pretty obtuse, let’s be honest.
And there we have it…. #MAFSAU
— Jennifer McBain (@JenMcB) March 22, 2023
https://twitter.com/egghaters/status/1638476355255013377
Cam. FINALLY THE TRUTH. #MAFSAU
— Heather (@veresk24) March 22, 2023
CAM??!?!?! #MAFSAU
— meg teehee (@megsydtd) March 22, 2023
Man Cam wait a second before you speak ffs #MAFSAU
— katic_beckett_byrne_always (@Kikiagogo79) March 22, 2023
Talking about not feeling it and takes a mouthful of his food. The guy is a chump. #MAFSAU
— champagnejayne (@JAYNEMOLONEY) March 22, 2023
But then he somehow managed to be even nastier by snapping at Evelyn after she told him he was a dickhead for stringing Lyndall along. I see no lies.
“It’s a low blow,” she told him.
“Is it? That’s no good. Don’t trip on the way out,” he replied.
EVELYN (AND LYNDALL) STANS, WE RIDE AT DAWN.
Cam really just maximised his stats in shithead #mafs #mafsau
— Shakira Holmes 🍂🧋 (@roseetea) March 22, 2023
was so hoping evelyn would wine dump cam #mafsau
— 🤍 (@britttanyk) March 22, 2023
Aaand there they are, Cam: Your true colours shining through, as Cyndi Lauper said. What you just showed has always been a fraction of an inch beneath the surface – anyone breathing oxygen has sensed it. Can’t keep a good fuckboy down. #mafsau
— Kirri (@matineeidyll) March 22, 2023
Harrison, Adam Shannon, Dan and now Cam.
Long list of tools this season. #mafs #MAFSAU
— Nez (@fraggle73) March 22, 2023
How dare Cam speak to our queen Evelyn like that. What a rat bastard #MAFSAU
— Sciona (@SkiStreet31) March 22, 2023
Evelyn is 100% right about Cam being a complete asshole and also right to say it 💅#MAFS #MAFSAU #MAFSAustralia #MarriedAtFirstSight
— dr mimi🦇 (@drmimip) March 22, 2023
Cam is like damn the show is almost over and I haven’t bid for king of the fuck boys yet, better chuck my fishing rod in the ring #mafs #MAFSAU
— Georgia Duncan (@_georgiarae) March 22, 2023
Judging by the final vows, it looks like Lyndall rips Cam a new asshole and I am giddy. I am elated. I am already mentally preparing a trip to Dan Murphy’s so I can pop a bottle of celebratory champagne afterwards. C U in the NT, you condescending gronk.
If you’d like to catch up on the rest of the utter nonsense which went down tonight, look no further than our gorgy recap.
If you’re still chomping at the bit for MAFS-related gossip, you can sign up to our newsletter here or give our podcast We’ve Done The MAFS (hehe) a listen.
