Logan Paul’s Meet & Greet At A Perth Woolies Has Been Canned, Much Like The Corn On The Shelves

Logan Paul standing in front of Woolworths Midvale holding a green shopping bag with text on screen which reads "tuna's in aisle 4" with a big red cross over the photo

It brings me extreme displeasure to announce that Logan Paul‘s meet-and-greet at a Perth Woolies is no longer going ahead amid safety concerns.

Pouring out my biggest bottle of PRIME for every 16-year-old boy in Perth who was fanging to rip into a bachelor’s handbag with the man.

A Woolworths spokesperson confirmed the truly devastating news on Thursday.

“Following a safety and security review and with the advice of WA Police, our security providers and the City of Swan, we are not satisfied in the interests of public safety for this event to occur at the Midvale Central Shopping Centre car park on Saturday February 11,” they said in a statement.

“We know this is disappointing for customers and fans of PRIME drinks, however, public safety must come first.”

ICYMI, Paul and YouTuber KSI announced on Tuesday that they’d be high-tailing it to Perth and Sydney to launch PRIME (the sports drink they created which has sent teenagers on TikTok into a tizzy), which will be hitting Woolies stores on February 22.

One would think Paul and KSI would do a meet-and-greet somewhere in the Perth CBD at, I don’t know, Culture Kings or some sort of event space. That would make sense, wouldn’t it?

According to Forbes, Paul’s net worth as of January 14, 2022 was US$18 million, so the man would have a bit of cash to splash on a big, sexy venue. I don’t know what’s saucy about plugging a drink which comprises mainly of coconut water and electrolytes, however, it’s not my promotional circus, nor my monkeys.

But alas, the PRIME team was gunning to hold the meet-and-greet in a fenced off section of the Midvale Central Shopping Centre car park. You see, a Woolies spokesperson confirmed that the event — when it still existed — wasn’t going to take place in the actual supermarket.

While holding the meet-and-greet (RIP) outside certainly makes more sense than having teenagers run amok inside a lovely Woolies, it still goes without saying that the Midvale Central Shopping Centre was an extremely random location.

Now, I have lived in Perth all of my life and don’t get me wrong — there’s absolutely nothing wrong with Midvale. I’ve never been there myself because I simply haven’t had a reason to, but I love me some taverns and private urban estates.

The suburb, however, is essentially en route to the country. Like, if you keep going past Midvale you’ll start hitting towns which boarders from my high school came from.

And now Logan Paul won’t have the opportunity to see the great expanse we call Perth’s east because he can no longer flog his little drinks in a carpark.

As Donald Trump famously said once: “SAD!”