If you haven’t started re-watching Gossip Girl in isolation, I’m not quite sure what the hell you’ve been doing with your time. But it turns out I’m not the only person who has found themselves obsessed with the scandalous lives of Manhattan’s elite in isolation, nor am I the only person wondering what the actual FUCK this show was.
Sure, there’s the fact that a bunch of literal teenagers are galavanting around New York City drinking martinis in bars, doing drugs and having sex. But that’s the whole premise of the show, so TikTokers have somewhat ignored that fuckery to focus on the more bat-shit storylines within the show.
Warning, you’re going to want to sit down for this.
For starters, there was that time when Serena decided to have a ~fashion~ moment at her graduation and just clipped her damn tassel into her hair. S, what are you doing?
@mirafink1Like what ##gossipgirl ##xoxogossipgirl ##serenavanderwoodsen ##blairwaldorf ##natearchibald ##chuckbass ##promdiy ##randomthings ##fyp ##foryoupage♬ original sound – .morgzzz
Or that time Chuck exposed the fucking INCEST.
@taliaddddddddddLmao I died ##fyp ##gossipgirl ##natureathome ##quarantinelife♬ original sound – .morgzzz
Perhaps you remember when Dan (aka Gossip Girl) casually lol’d about his little sister losing her virginity all over the internet?
@beauhowarthAnd that’s a secret I’ll never tell xoxo ##houseoftiktok ##fyp ##foryoupage ##gossipgirl♬ Laugh Out Loud – noodleboidave
And let’s not forget that time Serena told somebody to “text me your number,” despite never giving him her number to begin with. *bashes calculator* yep, adds up.
@chanel.elle.laOmg who else realized that while watching GG????? ##xoxogossipgirl ##serenavanderwoodsen ##damiendalgaard ##netflix
♬ Originalton – chanel.elle.la
But the storylines in this cursed show get WAY more fucked up than that. Are we even going to address the time Lily and Rufus had a lovechild for literally one episode? Where the hell did this kid go? Both of his parents are right here. What. The. Fuck.
@amnasadique7##gossipgirl ##xoxogossipgirl ##fyp ##foryoupage
And last, but certainly not least, we simply *must* appreciate Serena’s expert modelling advice. Serena Van Der Woodsen rawred so Gigi Hadid could RUN.
@jocelyn.mcfarland16xoxo rawr##fyp##foryoupage##foryou ##gossipgirl ##netflix ##blairwaldorf ##serenavanderwoodsen ##rawr
This barely scratches the surface of exactly how fucked up this show is, so if you’ve got 5 full days to spend doing nothing but watching Gossip Girl (no sleeping, sorry), I highly recommend binge-watching this cursed series.
