9 Things We Wanna See In Stranger Things Season 5 Bc Tbh, We Can’t Wait Forever
PEDESTRIAN.TV has teamed up with Vans to celebrate its new Stranger Things collection. Also, this article contains a heap of spoilers for Stranger Things season four. You've been warned.

I don’t know about you but I haven’t been the same since July 1st 2022.

‘What happened on July 1st?’ I hear you ask. The Duffer Brothers happened, that’s what. 

Yes, July 1st was the day I logged off work, bought myself popcorn, a bottle of wine, and some Pods (Mars flavoured, of course) and sat my ass down in front of the TV for hours to consume the most recent volume of Stranger Things

I’ve been a Stranger Things fan since that July night in 2016. It feels like a lifetime ago now, but to have watched these kids grow up and fight demons and demogorgons on repeat for years, well, you tend to form a connection (read: parasocial relationship). 

While some of my friends bravely managed to tease out the final volume of season four over a week or so, I binged the whole thing in the course of an evening in order to avoid any spoilers. Namely, spoilers from those super-quick TikTok fandoms. Those kids are bloody brutal. 

Anyway, it’s been over a month now and I think I’ve recovered from the finale enough to look ahead to season five. What will happen? Will Max be blinded forever? Will Jonathan join Nancy at college? Will these poor children ever be able to attend school???

Sadly, we may have to wait a while before we find out for sure but in the meantime, streetwear brand Vans is releasing a Stranger Things sneaker collection on August 26, both online and in-store. Clothes and accessories will be right behind the shoe collection like a Russian guard after Hopper, so keep your eyes peeled, gang.

While we wait for the nostalgic drop, let’s go down the fan theory rabbit hole.

How Will Is Connected To The Upside Down

In the final ep of Stranger Things season four we see Will get those eery chills up and down his spine once more. It’d been a while since he was so explicitly affected by the Upside Down but with Vecna destroying the town of Hawkins and escaping from the clutches of Eleven, will Will (ha) be able to sense evil again? Will he be overtaken by Vecna and try to kill his friends? And did anyone else notice his voice go a bit deep and evil-sounding when speaking to Mike at the Hopper house? Just me? Hopefully all will be revealed in season five.

9 Things We Wanna See In Stranger Things Season 5 Bc Tbh, We Can’t Wait Forever
Cool, cool, cool.

The Origins Of The Upside Down

While we’re on the topic, where the hell did the Upside Down even come from? We know that Eleven sent Vecna flying through time and space into this hell-like realm but what was said realm doing there in the first place? What’s with all of that floating stuff? According to Stranger Things Wiki, this parallel dimension previously consisted of “sprawling mountains and floating rocks”, but somehow, the Upside Down transformed into a copy of the human world as it existed on November 6, 1983. Spooky. It seems to be stuck in 1983 as well, proving that it’s not a perfectly flipped Hawkins dimension.

9 Things We Wanna See In Stranger Things Season 5 Bc Tbh, We Can’t Wait Forever
Everything the light touches is… the Upside Down.

Will It Be Revealed Why Karen Wheeler Had Her Own Poster For S4?

You may not be as deep into Stranger Things-Tok as I am but the fandom were almost frothing at the mouth over the poster theory. Basically, every major character (you know, Mike, Will, El, etc) had a poster for the release of season four. But so too did Karen Wheeler AKA Nancy-pop-the-glock-Wheeler and Mike Wheeler’s mum.

There’s one theory that Karen Wheeler is Vecna (AKA Henry Creel’s) sister, Alice Creel. Or, maybe she got a poster because she needs to be called out for forgetting her children are literally never home and out fighting for their damn lives every day. Season five may let us know.

9 Things We Wanna See In Stranger Things Season 5 Bc Tbh, We Can’t Wait Forever

Who Will Be The Winners Of The Twisted Steve-Nancy-Jonathan Love Triangle?

Look, Steve needed to grow up in earlier seasons but now? He wants “six little nuggets” and to drive them all around in an RV. AN RV, Nancy!! Meanwhile, Jonathan is off getting high and not communicating that he doesn’t want to go to the same fancy college as his girlfriend. But he also doesn’t want to get in the way of Nancy’s dream, thus making him a good guy. The back and forth between the three of them has been relentless but what will happen in season five? Nancy needs to choose, ASAP Rocky.

9 Things We Wanna See In Stranger Things Season 5 Bc Tbh, We Can’t Wait Forever
C’mon bestie, who’s it gonna be?

Karma For Rollerskating Girl

You know the one. El absolutely bodied her after her merciless bullying. While we’re here, can any Gen X-ers tell me if the bullying back in the day was that vicious? Because the whole time I was screaming at the TV wondering why an adult wasn’t at least attempting stepping in. Will rollerskating girl (apparently her name is Angela) get more comeuppance than a concussion? Or was she simply a plot accelerator in season four?

9 Things We Wanna See In Stranger Things Season 5 Bc Tbh, We Can’t Wait Forever
Same, El, same.

Hopper and Joyce To Actually Enjoy Some Time Together

It’s no secret that the internet is thirsty for Lily Allen‘s husband, AKA David Harbour. His character, Jim Hopper, has gone from a grumpy small town cop, into a true hero that can survive a prisoner of war camp. What a development. Joyce Byers also bloody rescued him from Russia in a small plane so that’s bad ass as hell. I hope they get a second to chill out together, maybe go on a date or something before having to save Hawkins for the fifth year in a row.

9 Things We Wanna See In Stranger Things Season 5 Bc Tbh, We Can’t Wait Forever
Us chained to the TikTok Hopper thirst traps.

For El To Survive

We’re getting welllll into spoiler territory now. YOU’VE BEEN WARNED! One big question we have for season five is will our favourite little science experiment survive this round? She’s come bloody close to death in pretty much every season and I truly thought she was done for when the CIA were shooting at her and Papa in the desert. She managed to escape from the slimy clutches of Vecna by the finale so who will win the good versus evil battle this time?

9 Things We Wanna See In Stranger Things Season 5 Bc Tbh, We Can’t Wait Forever
This is fine.

And, For MAX To Survive

MAJOR SPOILER WARNING.

9 Things We Wanna See In Stranger Things Season 5 Bc Tbh, We Can’t Wait Forever
Psychopaths reading this article before watching S4.

At the end of volume two, season four, we tragically watched Max Mayfield get cracked like a glowstick by Vecna. I thought she was truly done for. Literally screaming, crying, throwing up at 1 am. But then, old mate El comes in and gives Max some healing powers so now she’s not clinically dead. But… it appears the lights are on with no one home.

There are some cool theories out there that Max could gain superpowers through her injuries. Perhaps she’ll be able to sense evil or jump through time and space in her mind like Eleven. IMO, I don’t think that Max’s character is finished. After all, she now knows Vecna better than almost anyone. Could she help to defeat him and save Hawkins?

9 Things We Wanna See In Stranger Things Season 5 Bc Tbh, We Can’t Wait Forever
Still traumatised, tbh.

Finally, Please Let Them Give Will A New Haircut

I know it was the 80s but the poor child. Come on Duffer Brothers, they had buzzcuts back in the day.

Oh… my English teacher just called and said that the bowl cut represents Will’s innocence and the fact that he lost part of his childhood to the Upside Down. He’s behind his peers and constantly feeling left out. Will is seemingly also questioning his sexuality in season four. Perhaps a new haircut can symbolise a new chapter for the sweet boy. Bless him.

9 Things We Wanna See In Stranger Things Season 5 Bc Tbh, We Can’t Wait Forever

Alright. That’s enough theorising for one season. While we may have to wait over a year before season five is released, stick the new Vans x Stranger Things collab into your fandom-loving veins and onto your feet from August 26.

Want to be the first in line? Sign up at vans.com.au/strangerthings to be notified.