Sydney prepare your finest stretchy eating pants, because there’s a full-on schnitzel degustation hitting Glebe’s Toxteth Hotel next month, featuring eight (8) different kinds of schnitties. I’m already sinking into a food coma just thinking about it.

Now, it’s not all your run-of-the-mill pub schnitzels, either. Some of these crumbed dishes are taking the schnitz to unchartered territory, ranging from seafood to sweets. Dessert schnitzel, now that’s some serious food experimentation.

Kicking off with an abalone schnitzel with seaweed and radishes, the degustation runs through eggplant, Dory, veal, turkey, kangaroo, dessert (?) and, of course, a fancy-ass chicken schnit. It’d be blasphemous not to include the almighty chicken schnitty.

You can claim a seat at the table and tuck into this seriously snazzy-lookin’ schnitzel smorgasbord for a tight $50, which isn’t too bad considering you’ll be getting a bit of everything, here. It’s almost as if the chefs at The Tocky looked at the pub’s fridges and asked: will it crumb?

And if you’re into a cheeky brew or two, you can pay a little extra and get a specially-paired beer with every plate, from the team at Pirate Life Brewery.

Check out the full menu below, because it’s certifiably off chops.

Abalone schnitzel with seaweed and radishes
Eggplant schnitzel with crushed tomato, and mozzarella cheese
Dory schnitzel with salted baby capers, fondant potato, and lime mayo
Turkey schnitzel with pickled cabbage and apple sauce
Veal schnitzel with mushroom and sage butter, and mash potato
Wasabi and sesame crumbed chicken schnitzel with steamed rice
Kangaroo schnitzel with bush tomato compote and lemon myrtle
Dessert schnitzel with chocolate mousse, Anzac crumbs, and berries

Not sure how chicken schnitzel with rice is going to be, but hey I’ll give it a red-hot go anyway.

Cop a ticket over at the Toxteth’s website, and be ready to get absolutely schnit-faced for Spring.