Ranking Types Of Wine Based On How Well They Elevate The Mood Of A Sunny Arvo Shindig

LIZ MEON

There’s nothing better than a sunny Saturday arvo spent lounging around a park/beach/balcony with pals. You’ve got your UE Boom bumping the perfect playlist. Your charcuterie board has been perfectly assembled. The weather is warm but not uncomfortably hot.

And, of course, you’ve brought along a delicious bottle of vino to top it all off.

While it might be the most low-maintenance of all things to bring to a gathering, the type of wine you do bring along can seismically shift the whole vibe of the gathering you’re at — so it’s wise to mull over your decision (geddit).

If you need a little help along, here’s every wine ranked based on how good they go down on a sunny arvo, that’ll hopefully make your pitstop to Dan Murphy’s on the way a little easier.

8. Fortified Wine

Fortified wines exude the least easy-breezy summer-loving energy of all the wines — your ports, cherries, brandys (you get the picture). It’s not that they’re not delish or fun, it’s just they just require a very specific setting to enjoy, and a sunny-arvo gathering at the park is not one of them.

7. Dessert Wine

Again, it’s not that they’re not delish — dessert wines are just supposed to be enjoyed after a gorgine 12-course degustation in which the chef has handpicked each ingredient from their organic farm, not after wolfing down a box of Jatz and one of your friends’ feeble attempts at focaccia.

6. Orange

Orange wines are genuinely yet to hit the mainstream. While they may look the most aesthetically pleasing in an IG op or TikTok montage of your afternoon escapades, their distinct taste may prove too intense for some. Don’t spoil the party by being too different.

5. Red

Red — the fifth-best Taylor Swift album and the fifth most enjoyable wine to glug back at a sunny-arvo gathering. I love a glass of red paired with a rich sugo as much as the next Calabrian. However, I do not love red wine-stained teeth. Sunny-Saturday arvo gathos mean photo ops, so opt for something that’s not going to leave a love letter on your pearly whites.

4. Moscato

The sweet pea of the lot. Gosh, bringing Moscato to any gathering will indeed divide who the un-pretentious fun-lovers are and who the uppity sticks in the mud are. However, much like the funny-yet-loud member of the friend group, too much Moscato can lead to an untimely headache and cut the whole shindig short. Proceed with caution.

3. Sparkling

Champers and chardi can make even the most derro of gatherings feel fancy. You can dazzle them up with a bit of fruit and Bob’s your uncle — you’ve got a cocktail too. You’ll immediately feel like Camperdown Park is the South of France or the Amalfi Coast — something we’re all in need of.

2. White

White wine is the most universal of all the grape-born drinks. It’s the popular kid at every party — need I say more?

1. Rosé

Rosé was invented for sunny afternoons. They didn’t start whacking ‘frosé’ bars at every summer event imaginable over the last couple of years. It’s fruity, tangy and just straight-up tasty — it owns sunny arvos.

If you’re having trouble picking out a bottle of vino for your next event, you can suss out the list of Dan Murphy’s Decoded Wine Awards winners from this year and cop of a bunch of them for under $20. You can also check out our brand-spanking-new trivia game called ‘Know Your Sip’ to test your and your mates’ knowledge of wine too.

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