Ah, the classic Aussie road trip. It’s such a romantic idea in theory, as long as you’ve never seen Wolf Creek. There’s something tempting about hitting the road on a whim, exploring our glorious land from the safety and comfort of your automobile.
But if you’re a fly-by-the-seat-of-your-dacks kinda person, the planning involved in a spontaneous getaway can make you go “Yeah, nah”, and you end up sitting on your arse like you do every other weekend.
Getting organised is not as hard as it seems though, o lazy one. If you make sure all your road trip essentials are covered before you fang it down the freeway, you’ll have a cracker of a time.
PREP YOUR WHEELS
We’re all smart enough to pump our ride full of petrol before shooting off into the wilderness. You might even have the foresight to go to the servo and check the air in your tires (your car’s manual will tell you the required amount). If you’re really a thinker, you’ll also make sure you have a spare tire in working order, just in case you pop one on the the road.
Occasionally, your car can cark it for another reason: the dreaded flat battery. Maybe you’ve made the rookie mistake of leaving your lights on during an extended toilet stop and it’s totally your fault, you incontinent idiot. But often car batteries go on the fritz themselves because they’re old, there’s a dodgy connection, or because you haven’t driven your car in bloody ages.
Either way, a flat battery has the potential to be a total road trip killer. But the good folks at Battery World offer 24/7 mobile service nationwide, so if your car isn’t starting then you won’t be stranded on the side of the road forever. Help is just a phone call away.
FULLY STOCKED
Before heading off, coffee and brekkie is a must. If you’re leaving at sparrow’s fart, research your local cafes before leaving to figure out which places open early – because there is legit nothing worse than being in a confined space with a mate when neither of you have had caffeine.
In terms of car snacks, one trip to the shops can sort your stomach out for the long road ahead. But you gotta make sure all your bases are covered – don’t just buy a shitload of chocolate or the sugar crash will be extreme. Balance your choccy binge with some protein and carbs, like those small bags of nuts and sultanas, pre-popped popcorn, those cute lil’ Babybel cheeses, and even a tub of hommus with some chopped up carrots. That should keep your energy levels up, which is obviously super important if you’re the deso driver.
You might have your other luxuries you wanna stock the car with, like ugg boots, blankets, fabulous road trip headscarves and aviator shades, but to avoid a miserable time, don’t forget the big three: a pillow, a bottle of water, and your phone charger.
BYO FUN
As much as you love your friends, the chitchat can get stale on a long trip and you might need a bit of help in the entertainment department. If the thought of playing “I Spy” as a grown-ass adult make you want to drive nails through your eyes, try a podcast to fill in the awks silences and promote conversation. There’s literally one for every since hobby or interest you might have, so all you’ve got to do is search a topic in the Podcasts app. But if you’re a newbie and need a starting off point, hit up these:
- How Do You Sleep At Night?: One of ABC’s newest podcasts, hear from people who live controversial lives and how they face judgement on a daily basis. It will test your empathy levels, big-time.
- My Dad Wrote A Porno: Just straight-up hilariously cringey smutty fun. If you’ve got a token Prude Friend, steer clear.
- How Did This Get Made?: A group of comedians dissect some of the worst movies in history.
- Cults: A pervy look into what goes on within inside the walls of these off-the-grid organisations.
- Serial: Because you never listened to it the first time and now when people talk about Adnan Syed you can sound informed.
Music-wise, you’re probably killing the game with your own fire Spotify playlists.
Sometimes you can get bored of your usual tunes, which is when the radio function is a blessing. Pretty much every genre is covered, but for a classic road trip vibe you can’t go past the 1970s, tbh. A bit of 90s nostalgia is always a winner, too.
GOOD ROUTE
Although it sounds delightfully carefree, just driving off in any random direction can actually be a dud move, especially if you’re faced with just freeway for five hours. Pick a destination that has interesting pit stops along the way – you’ve got to have driving breaks anyway, so you may as well make them fun.
Look for cute little towns that aren’t too far off your route so you don’t add hours to your trip. Google Maps will also show you scenic points of interest you can stop at, so your Instagram story will no doubt be stacked by the end of your journey.
Happy trails, m8s.
