Uber’s Released A List Of The Weirdest Shit Riders Have Left Behind & JFC

There’s nothing worse than leaving your stuff in an Uber, especially if it’s valuable or has some kind of sentimental value to you. But hey, we all have moments of baffling clumsiness, don’t we?

To celebrate Mercury going into Retrograde on April 9 (according to astrology, this is the time when everything goes to shit), Uber have released their Lost & Found Index.  

Essentially, they’re spilling the beans on all the strange crap you weirdos have left in their cars, along with some other interesting stats. 

Let’s start with the boring – the 10 most commonly forgotten items. 

1. Phone 
2. Ring 
3. Keys 
4. Wallet 
5. Glasses 
6. Purse 
7. License / ID 
8. Gloves / Glove 
9. Charger 
10. Sunglasses

Cool, but also very vanilla, let’s get to the juicy stuff. Here’s 45 of the most unique lost items. Because I’m a good and nice bloke, I’ve highlighted the ones that I find the weirdest so we can collectively share our bewilderment. 

1. Paintings
2. Lobster
3. Sweet potato care package
4. Payslip
5. Guitar
6. Engagement Ring
7. Rubber Mallet
8. School Papers
9. Chair
10. Chips
11. Notary bag
12. Pool stick
13. Smoke Machine
14. Valuable Nordic Walking Poles
15. Pearl earrings
16. Wedding outfit
17. Hard drive
18. Stroller
19. Crime & Punishment book
20. Grill set
21. Meat packet
22. Wooden Hat
23. Lottery ticket
24. Back massage device
25. Rose Quartz
26. Mustard
27. Bible
28. Elf cut-out
29. Tap handle
30. Expensive slipper
31. Harry Potter glasses
32. Salsa Verde
33. Kite
34. Cape
35. Potted plant
36. Nintendo
37. Dog Sweater
38. Contact Lenses
39. Diary
40. Tickets
41. Arm sling
42. Vacuum
43. Jewellery Box
44. Money bag
45. Violin

I know what you’re thinking. What in dog’s name is a “sweet potato care package”? Allow me to respond with “fucked if I know”. 

Moving on, here’s the most forgetful cities.

1. Perth
2. Gold Coast
3. Adelaide
4. Melbourne
5. Brisbane
6. Sydney
7. Canberra
8. Hobart

The most forgetful days of the week. 

1. Sunday
2. Saturday
3. Friday
4. Monday
5. Thursday
6. Tuesday
7. Wednesday 

And finally, the 5 most forgetful days of 2016.

1. October 30
2. December 11
3. December 18
4. December 4
5. November 20

Quit forgetting your lobsters, you strange units. 

Photo: Dude, Where’s My Car.