Hold The Phone: Apple Is Replacing The Gun Emoji W/ This Water Pistol

Uhhh guys? We don’t mean to alarm you, but Apple is binning the gun emoji.

Instead, they’re replacing it with this lime green water pistol thingy:

~ SQUIRT SQUIRT MOFOS ~
Apple HQ announced this morning that a bunch of new emojis are hitting your phone soon, to be released with iOS 10 sometime in the “fall” – a.k.a. anytime between now and October.
Overall, these new emojis are a bloody great bunch all about gender diversity and inclusivity. They include female athletes (just in time for Rio), single parent families, the gay pride flag, and the dude version of the classic ‘haircut’ one:
 
But Apple’s decision to delete the gun emoji completely is rustlin’ a few jimmies. While they haven’t made an official statement about it (and are in fact refusing to ~officially confirm~ the gun emoji is getting deleted at all), it’s obviously a statement in favour of gun control and a big “fuck you” to gun-lovin’ America.
HOWEVER… Riddle us this: without the gun emoji, how are millennial iPhone users supposed to express hyperbolic sadness without the winning combination of gun + ‘crying so hard two rivers have formed on my face’ emojis? How?

Somehow, this doesn’t cut it.

On the flip side, those two emojis can really only mean a handful of things, and every single one of them is sexual. 

We await the inevitable iPhone / Android miscommunication fuck-ups with glee.
Source: Apple.

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