The twelve remaining Big Brother contestants might be some of the luckiest people in the country, as they’ve been able to avoid witnessing the finger-pointy trainwreck that has been the 2013 Election campaign. However, because every vote counts, four political leaders have appeared in recorded messages to the Big Brother housemates, eschewing the virtues of their parties and trying to grab the elusive “vapid and self-absorbed contestant on outdated and irrelevant reality show” vote.

Christine Milne
appeared in kindly assistant primary school principal mode, and Clive Palmer was predictably hilarious, rushing through his video like he was halfway through an escape from a loose velociraptor.
Tony Abbott, however, took the opportunity to cross the line from “Daggy Dad” to “Creepy Dad” as he presented his hot daughters, rather than any sort of policy or even a political viewpoint, as the best reason to vote for him. Describing his visibly embarrassed daughters as his “best assets”, his cringeworthy speech included references to his volunteer firefighting and Speedo wearing surf living saving, and he closed by saying “If you want to know who to vote for, I’m the guy with the not bad looking daughters”. Younger hot daughter Bridget Abbott tried to salvage a little family pride with a quick “keep it up” speech to the housemates, while older hot daughter Francis was too mortified to speak.
Kevin Rudd‘s video wasn’t personalised for the housemates, but instead a pre-recorded promo in which he pushed his viewpoint on marriage equality as the best reason to vote Labor, which brought some housemates to tears.
The housemates, with an Australian Electoral Commission representative on hand to assist, made their absentee selections as to who they wanted to vote out of the House (of Parliament) shortly after watching the videos.