You’d never know it looking at her from behind the dense foliage growing outside the £8 million compound she calls her home in North London but Kate Moss turns forty-years-old (40) today. Happy birthday, Kate.
Having asserted her influence over the fashion industry and world at large for the past twenty-six years, during which time she has evidently made The Seven Signs of Ageing™ her bitch, Moss at forty emits the same effortless DGAF steez that her younger contemporaries cultivate to within an inch of their life without all the added posturing and transparent headline-grabbing tactics. I’m looking at you, Delevingne.
ACCESSORISE WITH A ROCKSTAR, BELLBOY
Sure a fedora, a flower crown, a giant weekender Birkin or – if you’re desperate, God forbid – a Native American headdress might seem like a great idea for an festival accessory at the time, but a handy rule of thumb straight from The Moss Handbook of Life Lessons is: ‘Less is more; don’t over do it, especially in front of a Daily Mirror hidden camera.’ Instead, accessorise with a rockstar boyfriend and a bellboy who can overdo it for you. Any rockstar will do for an enabling proxy: think a Babyshambles frontman, or one from The Kills. They’re easy enough to find at a festival; if you can’t find one, you’re not trying hard enough.
YOU DO YOU, P.Y.T.
You’re pretty, you’re young, and you’re almost certainly a thing, so perhaps the best style advice discernible from Kate Moss’s forty years on this Earth is You Do You. Below is a great example not only of sexy festival-ready layering (a scoop neck singlet, rosary beads, embellished leather accessories, a rope trim trilby) but also a fitting demonstration of what makes Moss unique – she literally DGAF. Lesson learned: play to your strengths – in this case, feathered multicoloured hair and those pins. Pair wardrobe staples with left of centre pieces, like a Sgt. Pepper Bridal Wear vest and gold hot pants, because you really do only YOLO once and you bought those sequinned bloomers so you might as well get some wear out of them. ¯_(o_O)_/¯
WIN THE GENETIC LOTTERY
Can’t help you with this one, sorry. You’re on your own here.
GUMBOOTS
This one’s pretty self-explanatory. The de rigueur gumboot of chic moles the world over are made by Hunter, but any old pair will do. Marc by Marc Jacobs make some fun coloured ones, as do Targét and everyone in between. The ball’s in your court and the balls of your feet will be comfortable and dry.
COVER, GIRL
Regardless of the weather and disregarding the questionable aesthetic properties of this slouchy grey flat cap, it’s important to shield your eyes from the harsh UV rays of the sun and the corrosive glares of Haters alike with adequate, stylish eyewear.
You literally can’t go wrong with an all-black ensemble (caveat: do not cover your face, for the love of God). Instead, opt for quintessential rock and/or roll shades in the form of some classic Ray Bans, a peak shouldered leather jacket à la Balmain circa 2009 and some simple but nonetheless effective hardware. Remember when Kate Moss shopped at the Tree of Life stall at the 2011 Splendour pop up mall? Now you do.
