I’m struggling to wrap my fingers around this one, but in short, it’s a saucy little segment from Burke’s Backyard that was recently recovered / splooged all over Reddit.
It features a plant getting whacked off by a pleasant woman called Kay, and it is breathtaking from start to finish:
The segment on Philodendron Selloum is underscored by deeply sensual, 1920s-big-band style music. Don goes on to explain:
“It’s not until late, on one particular night in the year that each flower becomes heavily perfumed and sexually receptive.”
He then meets with Kay, and boy does she have a green thumb or two.
She tenderly “pollinates” an incredibly dick-shaped plant by massaging it with impressive rhythm and grip-style. She remarks how hot it is to the touch – “about 96 degrees”.
kay, looking pretty pleased with the fruits of her labour
Don: “Looks as if it’s not an unpleasant thing to do.”
Kay: “No, it’s quite fun, actually.”
Not content with watching Kay have all the fun going hell for leather on the dingus flower, Don gives it a diddle himself… and upon viewing this sorry spectacle, it’s fair to assume he has never in his life pleasured a penis, not even his own:
the most noncommittal wristie of the century
Don, you are a true national treasure and we thank you for this. Our backyards are all the better for it.
Source: YouTube.
Photo. YouTube / pedestrian.tv.
