That Borked Christmas Tree Has Been Replaced After It Went Viral For Being, Well, Fully Fucked

port macquarie christmas tree replaced

The NSW council that put up a tree only Santa’s mother could love (read: hilariously dogshit) has replaced the half-assed attempt with a fake, better-decorated tree. Sorry mates, but you’ve immediately lost points for not sticking to the bit.

Port Macquarie’s first festive spirit attempt went viral this week because it looked like someone had let three toddlers in a hi-vis trench coat up on a cherry picker to decorate it.

I’m not exaggerating when I say it gives off the biggest “absolutely phoned it in this week, boss” energy. It’s true that it looks exactly how a heap of us feel at this point in the year: exhausted and scraping the bottom of the barrel for the energy to be jolly.

The tree has since been decommissioned and replaced by an artificial one that is a lot less chaotic than the Norfolk Pine one (boo) after bad weather affected the tree. The Port Macquarie-Hastings Council said it had to take down the decorations on the original tree because they were falling off on their own.

“Unfortunately, the infamous lights will be removed, as they are slipping further down the tree and pose a safety risk,” the council said in a Facebook post.

“We are concerned if we leave the inflatable baubles up, we may not have any left by Christmas.”

Port Macquarie-Hastings Mayor Peta Pinson told the ABC she wasn’t expecting what she saw when she flicked the lights on the Norfolk Pine last week.

“When we turned the lights on, there was an ‘oh my’ moment … and I joined in that moment,” she said.

“It was kind of, ‘Ooh, that wasn’t what I was expecting’.”

She said council workers spent Wednesday de-Christmasing the real tree and putting up the replacement tree the coastal town has used in previous years.

“We’ve also got to bring our Norfolk Pine back to her former dignity,” she said.

“So within the next couple of days things will be perfect and proper and just the way people want them to be.”

Not gonna lie, I kinda preferred the borked Christmas tree and I deeply hope they bring it back in a more weather-proofed way next year. Viva la fucked-up tree.