Oh Joy: The Latest ‘Young Homeowner’ Success Story Is A Legit Pick-Up Artist

As a generation in this country whose dreams of home-ownership continue to be just that, Baby Boomer-run mainstream media outlets love nothing more than to tell us how best to get over ourselves, pull ourselves up by the bootstraps (lol wtf is even a bootstrap you old fucks) and just buy a bloody house.

This is most often attempted by parading in front of us a never-ending stream of young people, who through ardent avocado-avoidance or a stark refusal to ever have fun, have somehow snuck into the housing market. 
Almost always however, these young go-getters inevitably have recieved huge injections of cash or the erstwhile support of a loaded parent. Whodathunk it?
Well get ready for another fun edition of “well fuck that guy”, as the latest home-owner for millenials to try and imitate is a Sydney tycoon who’s scored himself six properties by the young age of 33, apparently mostly due to his side hussle as a ludicrously expensive pick-up artist.
Denzel Jones from Sydney’s Northern Beaches has had his little story of success picked up by the likes of News.com.au and the NZ Herald, both praising his male confidence course he calls the ‘School of Attraction‘, for helping him become such a proud home-owner.
Whilst Jones’ full-time job as an art director no doubt already has him earning a bit more than most millenials, Jones’ reckons his pick up artistry classes, which he charges a ridiculous $4250 per three-month course for, is the reason he could scoop up six properties.


“House prices are expensive so a lot of people assume they can’t get into the housing ­market and don’t do anything. The anxiety that usually clouded my judgment when approaching life’s challenges, turned into excitement and anticipation. Now as a coach at SOA, I look to bring out the fire in all our students and help them get the most out of themselves, as I know we all have so much to offer, especially to women.”

Whilst Denzel says he and his school aren’t “about teaching pick-up lines or deceiving women for sex,” and that it’s more “about building men’s self-esteem up so they come across as more confident” it’s hard to shake the association of such classes with that whole nefarious approach to interacting with women (also known as, you know, human beings) more at home on a super fucking gross mens-rights-activist forum.

Moral objections to treating women like property or a game that a man must “win” aside, can we stop with the whole discourse that the property market is totally fine and super approachable for young Australians, when we fucking KNOW that isn’t the case
I’m not sure how constantly waving these exceptions to the rule around change anything, especially when even the country’s top economists are saying we’re practically shut out of home-ownership.
UGH! We’re all fucking screwed aren’t we?

Source: News.com.au
Picture: Denzel Jones / Facebook.

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