Let me preface this by saying that Kat Von D has just held the exact wedding that I absolutely wanted as a 16-year-old. From wearing a blood-red gown with matching trailing veil and train, to one room being an entirely white and the dining room entirely shades of red, I’m steamed that Kat Von D has beaten me, a woman with no prospective husband whatsoever, to the punch.

Kat Von D’s recent wedding to Leafar Seyer – an artist, musician, author, and man credited with kicking off the ‘cholo goth’ movement in Mexico – happened this week in an affair that would make both Tim Burton and Gerard Way weak at the knees.

Dripping in reds, whites, and blacks (the colours of the emo/goth uniform, thank you very much) the Beverly Hills Hotel transformed into a shrine for the creative couple, making the whole thing look like My Chemical Romance‘s ‘Helena’ video clip on both acid and steroids.

I mean just LOOK AT IT.

Kat, in all her glowing gothic Morticia Adams-esque glory, wore a gorgeous blood-red gown created by L.A. designer, Adolfo Sanchez, which he showed off on his Instagram.

Adorned with a headpiece that mimicked horns (or antlers? I dunno I’m not a stylist), Kat and Leafar embraced in front of a staircase smothered in white floral arrangements and a dancer (?) in a full latex number carrying her train.

The cake was a massive, blood-red castle with a little hologram-projection-thingy of the happy couple dancing in the door’s archway. The whole place was literally dripping in red candle wax. Kat played the piano and sang. It’s a goth queen’s wet dream and holy shit I’ve never needed something so much in my whole life.

The extravagant eleganza extended out to the wedding gifts too, with the Kat Von D Beauty team developing a special lipstick especially for the day, a black lippie with gold flecks because of course it is.

The whole wedding existed under the phrase En Vida Y En Muerte, which is “in life and in death” in Spanish. Ugh, my bleeding heart.

Image: Instagram / @thekatvond