Pack ‘Er Up Boys, Bill Shorten Has Already Won The Election With This Shirt

Bill Shorten

If the scores of people waving placards in you face had not already made it obvious, today is election day, but we might as well just back it up and call the damn thing right now, as Bill Shorten has already won the day thanks to the shirt that he wore in Melbourne this morning.

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Earlier this year, the good people over at The Feed on SBS suggested that the opposition leader might do well to capitalise on his wife’s likeability and charisma by changing his slogan to Vote #1: Chloe Shorten’s Husband.

Bill Shorten now appears to have done just that, as he was seen rocking a shirt emblazoned with those very words on an early-morning run:

Bill and Chloe Shorten cast their votes at Moonee Ponds West Primary School this morning, and per reports in The Guardian, he said that if Labor wins, they will get right to the business of governing. Laying out his plans, he said:

“In the event that the people of Australia voted to stop the and voted for action on climate change, we will be ready to hit the ground from tomorrow. We’ll be ready to start straight away and we’ll start straight away.”

“My first Cabinet meeting, the first order of business, we will put a submission to the independent umpire to get the wages moving again for millions of our fellow Australians. My first legislation will be to reverse the cuts to penalty rates. We will convene the Parliament as soon as possible to start action on climate change.”

Current Prime Minister Scott Morrison has been campaigning in Tasmania in the marginal seat of Bass, and will be heading to Sydney through the day. He told Sunrise:

“I’ve always said this election is going to be close. Five weeks ago, people weren’t saying that. I’ve always known it to be the case, because Australians take their decision and their choice very seriously. And at this election they do have a choice today. They have a choice between myself and Bill Shorten as Prime Minister. A government that knows how to manage money and a Labor party that has never proven they know how to manage money.”

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