Justin Bieber Has Unleashed ‘Yummy’ Into The World, In All Its Sugary, Horny Glory

In case you wanted to hear Justin Bieber sing “yummy yum” on repeat over the top of a slow trap RnB beat, 2020 is allowing you such privileges. Yep, the Canadian boy-next-door turned tattooed-bady-boy has just dropped his first single in four years titled, you guessed it, ‘Yummy’.

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The first solo music we’ve heard from Bieber since 2015’s Purpose, and I’m very glad to report that since getting married to Hailey Baldwin, his horniness has increased tenfold. He’s allowed to be horny now, he’s wedded and bedded in the eyes of the Lord.

With freshly-bleached hair, the Year Of The Bieb begins early, as ‘Yummy’ is the first single from his upcoming sixth studio record, which is expected to land sometime this year.

The lyric video dropped at the same time and please just join me in reading through this one. Do I need to know about Bieber’s eyes rolling back and his toes curling? Absolutely not. But I do and I’m calling the Horny Jail police right now.

Despite all of this, it’s catchy. It’s catchy as all hell in the kind of way that I can promise you that in about a day’s time I’m going to be doing something completely innocuous and I’ll just absent-mindedly singing this to myself. It’s going to get stuck in my head for weeks.

That hook of “yeah you got that yuuuummy yum, that yuuuummy yum, that yuuummy yummy” is our first earworm of the new decade. And now that it’s in my head it’s only fair that it’s in yours too.

You’re bloody welcome. Cheers Bieber you horny, horny young man.