Jack White Issues Lengthy Apology after Latest Black Keys Beef

There’s a reason Jack White is legendary for his music and not his calm, level-headed approach to starting arguments with other bands. White, who once beat the crap out of The Von BondiesJason Stollsteimer in a Detroit bar fight, has taken to throwing jabs at The Black Keys. Last year, it came to light that he did not want his children enrolled in the same Nashville private school as Dan Auerbach‘s kids, saying that this would  give Auerbach “yet another” chance to follow him around and “copy” him. The Black Keys themselves were largely bemused by the whole deal, and responded that they had never met White, and felt “embarrassed” for him.

Clearly not one to take a hint, the singer continued to rant about The Black Keys in a recent Rolling Stone interview, where he took yet another yet another swipe at them in the amusingly belligerent, old-mannish way that only Jack White can. “I’ll hear TV commercials where the music’s ripping off sounds of mine, to the point I think it’s me,” he said “Half the time, it’s the Black Keys.” He also called them the musical equivalent of kids at school who dress like everyone else because they don’t know how to be original by themselves, which is a pretty Mean Girls-level insult for a 38-year-old dude to lob, but sure.

In the same interview, White was graceful enough to acknowledge that, while he didn’t technically invent the blues, he popularised it in a contemporary sense, much like Amy Winehouse did with white soul and beehive haircuts. He then took the opportunity to slam artists like Lana Del Rey and Adele for aping Winehouse’s style, and requested that everyone just get the fuck out of his grill already, especially bands like The Black Keys. 

After the news broke, White took to his website to issue an apology to those he insulted, lest he be “hounded by nonsense” for the remainder of his tour this year. In his letter, he invoked the classic “sound bite” defense, saying he’d been quoted out of context by Rolling Stone. He wished The Black Keys “all the success” that they can get, and said he hopes their new album stays in the Top 10 for many months. Wishing a band “all the success” that they can get is a teeny, tiny bit passive aggressive, a bit like saying a cold service station burrito is the “best” you’ve ever eaten, but I’m sure The Black Keys will take it. 

In the lengthy post, he also took the time to mend fences with Lana Del Rey and Adele and praise their “powerful, positive” voices. Just for good measure, he also took the time to address recent stories about his estrangement with Meg White, saying that this was “blown out of proportion” by media reports. As we speak, it’s fairly likely that White is penning another apology letter and leaving a blank space for whomever he happens to offend next.

via Vulture
Picture: Frederic J Brown via Getty Images